King of Kings Session 14 After Action Report

A bit of a shorter one! Not as much happened this session, so it mostly ended up as a sort of information gathering session. Also, this sesh happened like half a month ago, July 17th; I kept on putting off writing the post. My bad!

Dramatis Personae

Ishthyromeda the Small, level one Amazon

Manchugo Coldeswain, level one cleric dedicated to Damir, foreign god of the trade routes

She-That-Is-Harrowed-By-Our-Lord-In-The-Stars-Is-Blessed-With-Prophecy, level one scholar

also Parsani, scrawny son of a rural matriarch

(Note: She-That-Is-Harrowed-By-Our-Lord-In-The-Stars-Is-Blessed-With-Prophecy will be referred to as "Harrowed" for the remainder of this report and also probably for all future session reports)

The day previous, the group used a charm spell to get information out of the nasnas in the basement and to let them know that they wouldn't harm them. After making camp, they rested there in the walled farming compound. In the morning, the group realizes that they have been robbed! Manchugo having lost some rope and Ish having lost some food. After breakfast, Rohm'Daan had to depart for religious obligations back in Tabur (i.e. his player couldn't make it), and while the day's plans were being discussed Coro the Esoterian, tired and old, agreed to watch the group's supplies above ground while the rest of them ventured down below (i.e. his player also couldn't make it). Passing Rohm'Daan on the road back to Tabur, however, was a foreigner who had recently made contact with Farzaneh Taburi, and who had heard talk of the group's expedition. This was Harrowed, a scholar from a far off land with an affinity for insects, who joined the group for the day's venture back into the abandoned basement.

(Note: I had the players choose what got stolen in the night, and since Rohm'Daan and Coro's players weren't present for the session they didn't get to pick. I'll just bring it up next time they join.)

Western Caspian Turtle (Mauremys caspica)

After introductions were exchanged between Harrowed, Ish, Manchugo, and Parsani, the four set about finishing up where they left off the day previous. First, they went back to the outhouse where they heard a mysterious hissing yesterday, and opened the door to find... a very large turtle, its legs splayed out on the outhouse seat, hissing at the interlopers! They pick the turt up and gently place them down in the overgrown vegetable garden, although they agreed to pick him back up before they left to go back to Tabur.

After the small encounter with the outhouse turtle, the small group of adventurers went back down into the basement to enlarge the ant hole that they went through previously, so it would work better as a potential escape route or for repeated visits. Using some rusted shovels found leaning on the wall of the house outside, they set to work and make it large enough for someone to walk through, rather than having to crawl on hands and feet like before. They notice, as they work, that there are no sounds of the nasnases in the other room, and when they check the room before venturing further they notice that the creatures are gone!

Their work attracts a large group of the giant ants who live in a network of tunnels connected to the basement. Ish is cautious around the ants, and while she wants to explore the ants' tunnels she doesn't wish to anger them. Harrowed, after the digging at the hole is done, goes to the giant ants that have crowded around them and attempts to speak with them. Harrowed's monastic sect has a careful and considered relationship with insects, and so by relying on bodily communication a very simple sort of back and forth can be established, although it takes time. (Note: I just ruled that this bug communication works the same as a normal scholar class specialization, which you can see described here. It took basically an hour for Harrowed and the ant to have what would between two humans be only a few short sentences exchanged back and forth). 

While Harrowed attempts to make contact with the ants, the others take a break to eat some of their rations, and then one turn later they hear some snuffling sounds from the sloping passageway into the basement they entered through. Slowly moving back to check on it, Manchugo sees a pair of oversized weasels, which the group decide not to engage with.

After Harrowed's hour of focus, they report that the giant ants will allow the group to go straight through their tunnels and to a carved out passageway on the other end of their nest, a passageway that they dread, but that they are not allowed to enter any other chambers of the ant nest. The group agrees, and gently crawls into the giant ant's nest, as guests passing through. They crawl through one empty chamber dug out of the earth, then through a second round chamber that has on its southern edge a sloping tunnel carved out of the earth by tools not by ant mandibles, immediately apparent that something else dug it out, not the ants. In that chamber, they also find, hidden under a small pile of loose dirt, ten drachmae and a crystal syringe full of a strange green liquid. After pocketing the coins and the syringe, they venture into the dark dug out passageway that the ants dread.

After a lengthy march down the sloping passage, the four of them end up in a strange immense structure that none of them recognize. It is a massive open space, completely dark except for the minuscule spheres of light from their lamps, with a walkway that curves past them and out of view. This walkway seems to spiral around the edge of an immense cylinder, so large that they can't even clearly see the other side from where they stand, and they can only just make out the vaunted, curved ceiling high above them when they lift their lanterns up high. Above them is a stony dome shimmering with slime and dripping water, the walls similarly covered with green algae and slowly dripping slime. In this ancient structure, these adventurers are deeper in the earth than they have ever been before.

They realize that this place is likely That Which Yawns Deep which they heard in prophecy, and agree not to spend too long down here with such a small group. They plan to scout a little and then return to Tabur, to come back with a larger group. With that plan in mind, they send Parsani back to the surface; they don't want to have to tell his mother that he died in this dark and dingy place. They begin to crawl down the slowly sloping spiraling walkway, careful with their footing so as to not fall into the unknown depths below.

A giant slug by Tony DiTerlizzi!

Up ahead, they make out a scraping noise that catches their attention. Weapons at the ready and slowly inching forward, a vague lumpy shape takes form on the edge of their lantern light, slowly coming into focus as they get closer and see... a giant slug! It is larger than any of the adventurers, and is adhered to the wall and walkway at a right angle, scraping algae off the wall with its rough radula. After some discussion, they decide to just not mess with it and to not bother trying to climb over it, and so turn around and go back up to the surface.

The classic giant slug from the AD&D Monster Manual!

Grouping back up with Coro and Parsani on the surface, they set out for Tabur. Just outside Tabur, they run into a group of noblemen and their hangers on who are playing a game of polo out in the rolling hills of the valley. Manchugo strikes up a small conversation with one of them, who takes kindly to his polo advice and throws him a golden denar as a gift. Passing through the northern gate into the Tigerskin District, they get by with only an inspection of their goods. When they report to Farzaneh, she is very glad to hear the news of Parsani's family switching allegiances to her noble house, and is interested in the alien cylinder buried deep within the earth that the group discovered. And with that, the session drew to a close!

Treasure Acquired

10 drachmae

1 denar (worth 100 drachmae)

A crystal syringe filled with a strange green liquid

Non Treasure XP Acquired

50 each for discovering That Which Yawns Deep

10 for Harrowed for successfully making contact with ants

Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 12 (Necrophidius to Osquip)

Meant to get back to the Fiend Folio review posts a bit sooner than this, but that's how the cookie crumbles. Picking up where we left off, starting with the monsters of the letter N!

Wiggly boy!!

Necrophidius (Death Worm)

★★★☆☆

A very iconic monster, very usable, but nothing super special. The necrophidius is a skeletal serpent with a human skull that has a paralytic bite, increased chance to surprise, and a hypnotic dance. Love the hypnotic dance, that is such a good evocative power, reminiscent of snake charming and such; I also just think that hypnosis powers are cool! Unfortunately, however, the specific details kind of make it a bit dull. That it doesn't check morale yet also cannot be turned by clerics is something that I don't like. I'm just partial to morale rules! Also, the litany of rituals that can be used to create it is unnecessary in my opinion. I like the specific aspect of the materials needed for the third ritual, namely that it needs the skull of a cold blooded murderer who was killed within the previous 24 hours, that's great that's fun. What I don't love is saying which specific spells from the cleric spell list need to be cast, or being able to pick and choose from a list of three different rituals, etc etc. I just would prefer more evocative stuff. A human headed skeleton snake is a great image though, and its got hypnosis powers, of course I'd use that.

The necrophidius originally appeared in the Fiend Factory column in White Dwarf, giving us another great opportunity to see the earlier version of a Folio monster! First, the illustration, which is so much more characterful and interesting than the Folio version. No offense to the original illustrator Alan Hunter, but I just have so much more fun with the scraggly lumpy smiling skull snake depicted here. Also, the Factory necrophidius actually was an undead monster rather than a construct, meaning that it can be turned by clerics (as a wight, according to the description), which resolves one of my major gripes with the Folio version. Its powers are exactly the same, but rather than being tied to three different possible rituals it specifies the one that involves the skeleton of a giant snake and a human skull, although with no mention of the murderer thing which is unfortunate; on top of this it names a specific sorcerer as the creator which I really love: "Karalkan (who was later to 'see the dark' and build the temple of the archdemon Kong)". See, that makes it so much more evocative, so much more interesting than a checklist of three mostly flavorless rituals to make it setting neutral. Don Turnbull comments that the hypnotic dance is a better way to make undead dangerous than level draining, and I completely agree! He also expounds on how he would run the power, with a saving throw to resist and if you fail the saving throw you're only in thrall until the necrophidius is distracted; I like that being presented as just his interpretation, rather than a set mechanic. The Fiend Factory necrophidius is a five out of five monster in my opinion! It sucks how much personality and flavor it lost in the transition to the Folio.

Needleman

★★★★☆

A super fun monster, and one that to me feels iconic to the Fiend Folio! A humanoid plant creature that at first appears to be a zombie, with needles embedded across its body that it can fire at will 1d6 at a time. I love the image of a shambling silhouette coming out from between trees in the fog, before spiny needles fly out at you. Personally, I wouldn't lean into the visual similarity with a zombie; it isn't really compelling enough to be a good trick, in my opinion. I think it would be more effective to make it seem like a person at first; fog or other visual impairments would help in that regard. The massively increased surprise chance in places with thick conifers or heavy undergrowth fits in that regard too! It is super vulnerable to magic, which is an alright weakness, although I don't really understand why. The charm plants spell is triple effective against it for some reason. Also, evidently they hate elves and attack them on sight? I mean, who doesn't.

The needleman also first appears in the Fiend Factory and OH MY GOD THAT ILLUSTRATION. Just on the illustration alone this is instantly a five out of five monster. Its empty staring eye sockets, the stance that it has which makes it seem so plodding and looming, maybe its taller than a person, a Boris Karloff esque marching figure, and the needles are so much more prominent, you couldn't possibly miss them. I feel bad saying this about the Folio illustration because it's by Russ Nicholson, a personal favorite of mine, but this original art is just so much better. Rather than being a plant that for no discernible reason looks like a zombie, the Factory needleman is a corpse that had Raise Dead imperfectly cast on it while it lay in a shallow grave lined with pine needles; such a specific backstory, it almost feels like a folk tale, like there would only really be One needleman. I think I like both versions equally, a mysteriously humanoid plant thing is super fun but a weird grave wanderer with pine needles embedded like pins in a pin cushion is super fun too. Maybe you could find the failed necromancer who bungled the spell? The version here, mechanics wise, is simpler and more effective, things that take a whole paragraph in AD&D are half a sentence here. Also, Turnbull ends his commentary by saying "Should it really be called the Aspirin? It is, after all, a pine killer..."

Nilbog

★★★★☆

An all time great trick monster, well deserved infamy. Though, Mr. Roger Musson wasn't the only one to discover how good the word "goblin" sounds when you flip it around; the folks over at Troll 2 named it a whole street! At its core, the nilbog is a five out of five monster, a weird little goblin that works inverted because of weird space time shenanigans, healing when hit and being harmed by healing potions. This effect even extends to the players, who feel intense urges to do the opposites of what they would normally do, i.e. they would load up treasure into a chest and leave empty handed if they attempt to loot a treasure chest, etc. I'm a tad torn on that aspect, mostly because I feel like there has to have been some shitty referee to forced their players to do something with no recourse to the contrary; I figure the intention is that the players should make the concerted effort to do the opposite of what they really want to do, but once that reverse psychology puzzle is figured out it kind of loses a bit of oomph. I also just don't like how this is specific to goblins, I think nilbogism should be something that can be present in many species. On top of that, were I to use nilbogized creatures, I'd love to give them interesting visual cues like weird sped back movements like they were being rewound on a VHS tape, or making them look like a photo with an inverted color palette. That perhaps ruins the trick part, but I personally would vastly prefer something that has a consistent problem the players have to work around to a trick that only really hits once.

What a slimy little bastard man

So many of these N monsters thankfully appear in the Fiend Factory! The nilbog is a fascinating example of a Factory creature, because, very unusually, Don Turnbull's commentary is considerably longer than the actual monster description. The original nilbog's description just describes that they look like goblins and their HP works backwards. None of the rest of the nilbog's powers are there at all. Turnbull does a good bit of extrapolation, comparison to other trick encounters, even suggests the deviously horrible idea of a troll beset with nilbogism which would be absolutely terrible. He also provides a snippet of additional information provided by the original creator of the nilbog, including a description of a nilbog encounter which I may as well share in its entirety.

I... don't think I would run such an encounter in such detail, but oh my gosh that is just insane. I definitely agree with Turnbull that "for sheer creativity, the Nilbog will take some beating." While I still feel pretty strongly that the four star rating is correct, it truly deserves its place as an iconic AD&D trick monster.

Nonafel (Cat O' Nine Tails)

★★☆☆☆

A large black panther with a long tail, which it can attack with despite no stinger or thorny end being mentioned or depicted in the illustration so I guess it is just the tail whipping at the players, which has the ability to split itself into nine different identical big cats. I think that the description spends far too long to describe the mechanics of this Naruto esque ability, how hit dice are distributed, etc. On top of that, a black big cat with a whiplike attack and strange spatial abilities... hasn't that already been done before? Unlike the kamadan which has even less in common with the good ol' displacer beast, the nonafel's description makes no attempted connection. I think the splitting into multiple identical copies is a nice enough ability, but there's not enough else here to really make it worth it I don't think.

I had to share both the illustrations!

Norker

★★★★☆

NORKERS!!! Maybe I'm the only person who actually feels this way about these guys, but I love norkers! I love their name, I love their weird slouched illustrations, I love the weird surreal idea of a like, cro magnon man equivalent for a nonhuman humanoid species of monster, it's just such a fun and simple humanoid! It sucks that they're basically never really utilized after the Folio, at least as far as I'm aware. I am much more open to these "missing link" hobgoblinoids than I am to other members in the AD&D expanded humanoid hierarchy, they feel more distinctive and unique, a lot more personality than just "goblin but stronger". The tusks do a lot! More things need tusks. I wonder why other goblinoids lost their tusks? Does the presence of tusks on these close (hob)goblin relatives imply that they have like, male combat hierarchies for mating? Are they for digging through dirt? I would love to puzzle out what their society might be like.

Nycadaemon

★★☆☆☆

The nycadaemon is almost identical to the mezzodaemon, so just check out my review for that inhabitant of Tarterus. Most of my complaints then hold true here: the nycadaemon is more or less just a bundle of expected demonic powers and weaknesses, including having a secret true name, magic resistance, immunity to non magical weapons and even magic weapons of +1, having a bunch of spells, etc. They don't even have the distinctive insectile appearance of the mezzodaemon, instead being more thorny reptilian with bat like wings, a more generic devil like appearance. The only real distinction from the mezzodaemon is that they are stronger, with physical strength comparable to a stone giant and stronger resistances. Not a fan.

Ogrillon

★☆☆☆☆

Not a big fan of the ever expanding roster of more or less identical humanoids in AD&D, and not a fan of generic hybrids of humanoid types where every possible combination has to be filled in. The ogrillon is a crossbreed between an orc and an ogre, and the rest of it basically flows out from what you probably assumed from that description. They look like orcs, they speak ogreish, even though both orcs and ogres use weapons they don't for some reason instead fighting with their "horny fists" (a bit of unusual word choice there). I'm kinda fascinated by the illustrations of them making them look all lumpy all over, but it's not that interesting of a visual just kinda quirky. The bottom illustration shows a lumpy man identical to the main ogrillon illustration, a humanoid with pointy ears and a single horn on the top of their head, and a boar headed man fighting a human fighter; are these all ogrillons? I'm down for that kind of visual diversity in a humanoid type, I just don't know if that was the intention here.

Osquip

★★★☆☆

Not gonna lie, there's actually not a whole lot here. They're basically just messed up rats, they live in tunnel systems underground and do things that you would expect tunnel dwelling beasts to do, and are invariably hostile. If I'm being completely honest, I would probably just use rats or some other real life digging creature, like naked mole rats perhaps. I love naked mole rats. Full of personality. The osquip gets three stars, however, for its own personality. While the description is super basic and spends way too many words to just say "these things live in tunnels underground and are ravenous predators", the illustrations show a horrible skuzzy little thing, completely hairless, with a toothless maw of forward pointing teeth almost forming an enamel beak. I love how awful they look!! I think I would totally use something that looks like the osquip, but just say that it's mutated rats or squirrels or something. Or just use really big naked mole rats. While I love the visuals, the mostly boring baggage of the rest of it doesn't really make me want to use it over a real world animal or a mutated version thereof. ALSO they oughta have a weird gross tail, it feels like they're missing out in the tail department.

That's all for now! We are a bit over halfway done with the Fiend Folio now. My goal is to finish this series of reviews before the end of the year; I really should have already finished it by now, but long gaps between posting will do that to the most well laid plans. See you next time when I review monsters that begin with P and Q!

Prehistoric War!!!

 Something that's been in the back of my mind for the past couple of days is making a combat system for a paleolithic/neolithic type game based on combat in the good ol' TSR war-game Chainmail. This has nothing to do with anything really, and in fact I have a bunch of other things I probably ought to be working on, but yknow this was on my mind so I had to bring it into the world. Maybe I could do some kind of Stone Age game at some point? Wouldn't wanna step on Pariah's toes too much!

So, the basics: the core of this is based on the Chainmail man to man table, but it also includes missile attacks and attacks and defenses from animals since I figure those would likely also be prominent in a Stone Age type game. Its a weapon vs. armor table, where the target number determined by the combination of the attacker's weapon and defender's armor is to be rolled equal to or over on 2d6. Could use it basically as a replacement for the d20 roll in the "Alternate Combat System", or using it straightforwardly with the Chainmail man to man system, do whatever really.

Chainmail also has a separate combat system for fantasy combats between fantastical/magical opponents, which I could totally see as an alternative to the modified man to man table I wrote up below. I prefer the idea of the modified man to man table though, because in the kind of culture that would exist in a late paleolithic/early neolithic environment things like weaponry would take more precedence than training or any kind of superhuman ability; no heroes or superheroes in the Stone Age! Perhaps some things could give a bonus, like having taken part in an empowering collective ritual? I don't know.

Putting the table in as an image because I don't think it would display right if I tried to squeeze it in the post as text

Since this is assuming the context of the Stone Age, specifically the late Paleolithic into the early neolithic (think the time around the building of Göbekli Tepe in what is now Turkey; I was actually writing this with early neolithic Anatolia in mind, or a more fantastical version at the very least), don't have to worry about horses, don't have to worry about metal armors, I also don't think have to consider shields much? I'm not aware of shields in the neolithic or paleolithic, if there are shields maybe they give a small bonus or something, like idk minus 1 to attacker roll or somesuch.

Instead, most armors are animal skins of different types, with the only entirely human made armors being textile and lamellar made from bone and wood. The different animal skins/hides/leathers on the table do double duty for both those actual animals in combat and humans wearing the skins of said animals. I just thought that that would be an interesting way to include animals and people in the same combat system while also communicating a type of shamanic or animistic element to the worldview of the people in the game. I was thinking of the practice of the berserkers in old Norse Scandinavia and of figurines like the Lowenmensch that combine human and animal features and the general preponderance of animals at places like Gobekli Tepe and Catalhoyuk. Maybe that could be expanded for specific types of animals, like wearing a lion skin gives you traits of a lion in combat, or it could be a bear, or a crocodile, or an ostrich, whatever.

Bird Skin: Primarily intended for flightless birds like ostriches and terror birds. Obviously none of those live around ancient Anatolia, but yknow I can include whatever prehistoric animals I want to include.

Some real fish leather armor, from Taiwan

Fish Leather: I think I'd use this for any aquatic creatures and for the skins thereof. Fish leather is a real thing you know! I don't think it would be very effective at stopping most things, but who knows. 

Thin Beast Hide: Originally I called this tier "Herbivore Hide", with the idea that herbivores are meeker, etc. Functionally, however, I think differentiating between thin vs thick is probably a better idea. Thin beast hides would be deer, antelopes, probably rabbit skins I bet, but also most carnivores such as lions.

Textile Armor: I feel like a lot of the time textile armor gets ignored! Textiles, quilted armor, and padded armor were much more common historically than leather armor was. I have no clue if textile armor was really used much in the neolithic, but I figure since people were able to make textiles by this point it isn't exactly impossible.

From the Cederberg Mountains, South Africa

Thick Beast Hide: Refer to thin beast hide, above. Elephants, hippopotamuses, rhinoceroses, oxen, I have no idea how thick their hide actually is compared to those but I feel like I'd put bears here too; they're pretty hardy animals!

Reptile Hide: Self explanatory. Again, no real prehistoric basis for this, but I do have a historic basis, in that reptile leather was used at times in certain ancient and medieval societies, like the ceremonial crocodile leather armor from Roman Egypt above. Also reptiles are a staple of prehistoric stuff.

A bone lamellar chest piece from prehistoric Russia, near Omsk

Bone/Wood Lamellar: Again, no real prehistoric basis, but all of the technology to make lamellar with materials like bone and wood were around so I just sorta assume that they had it. Lamellar, if you're not aware, is small plates of material, in this case bone or wood, together forming armor by being connected to one another.

Turtle Shell: Self explanatory.

Also I think the attacker weapons are mostly self explanatory. I included animal natural weaponry because I wanted to integrate animals and humans into the same combat system like I mention. I realized after writing the table that I didn't include anything for unnaturally large arthropods, which was an unfortunate omission! Big bugs are a staple of all tabletop roleplaying games, especially ones that I run; I think I would have them range from thick beast hide to turtle shell depending on the species, with either beak or crocodile bite for their attack again depending on species. What are mandibles if not a beak but sideways?

With carnivores and herbivores no longer divided, I was thinking that carnivores should get some sort of bonus. Perhaps extra attacks, or a penalty to the attacker's roll? I think that could work. This was partially suggested by a certain Gus L. Carnivores, no matter what type of hide they have, put a penalty of 1 or 2, depending on their size, to their opponent's roll. Terror birds get that minus 1, wolves get that minus 1, bears and lions get that minus 2, a crocodile would probably be minus 2 also which would make someone fighting a croc with fists impossible to succeed but yknow that's okay, who do you know that won in a fist fight with a crocodile?

Other ideas for this that are unrelated to the modified Chainmail man to man combat: EXP from wasting food? No currency in this world, trade done through ritualized barter between communities but inside communities stuff is just shared communally, etc. Things are given calorie values, and you have to eat a certain amount of game calories when you get exhausted, but to gain EXP you have to waste calories in the form of a ritual sacrifice or an ostentatious feast or by giving it to other people. No combat EXP; you can get the EXP from killing a deer or a shark or whatever by bringing the quarry back with you to your encampment or your local ritual site. Perhaps the best way to earn EXP would be sacrificing food in a ritual; go to a stone temple complex a la Göbekli Tepe and give up your quarry. I think I'd likely supplement that with EXP for exploration, like finding new locations and stuff. I've actually had EXP for food in some stuff before, but I like the idea of this one the most of the different ways I've implemented it. No clue what EXP or leveling would even really do for you though, when you can't really improve to hit chances or whatever since its a weapon based system. Maybe ability scores matter a lot and advancing in level improves ability scores? IDK!!

Other stuff for me to consider I guess: possible inclusion of ritual cannibalism? rules for taking prisoners? Maybe the ones that are already in Chainmail are good enough. It seems that massacres were rather common in the occasional circumstances of prehistoric warfare, so maybe that should be the assumed result of any kind of combat between human foes. If I wanted to include the extremely fantastical, like maybe super science stuff or shamanic magic or whatever, like if this were a sword and sorcery, erm, spear and sorcery type setting perhaps, how would that integrate into all this? 

Honestly, I don't really know what I'll do with this, if anything. It's not nearly as interesting an approach to prehistoric roleplaying as Pariah; really, go check out the link at the top! And check out their amazing blog too while you're at it.

King of Kings Session 13 After Action Report

 It's been a good while since the last time a session report was posted here, and even longer still since I posted a session report that I actually wrote! You see, that's because unfortunately King of Kings has been on hiatus ever since October of last year, but yesterday the campaign made its valiant return, and this time I'm deadset on avoiding such long gaps between sessions. So without further ado, here's a report on what my players got up to in the world of the eastern satrapies of the Enlightened Empire!

Dramatis Personae

Coro the Esoterian, level one magic user

Ishthyromeda the Small, level one amazon

Manchugo Coldeswain, level one cleric dedicated to Damir, foreign god of the trade routes

Rohm'Daan, level one cleric dedicated to Anzhalar, a local chthonic god of subterranean flame

also Parsani, scrawny son of a rural matriarch

The session began in Tabur, with the group awakening to the terrible news that Zana the Charlatan, their fellow adventurer and client of Farzaneh Taburi, was arrested by the city guard and jailed in the Iron Pit in connection to an accusation of arson by his rival Jamshid the Merchant! A few sessions before, when the group was traveling to Temple Town for the festival of Saint Jumhura, Kusa had set fire to Jamshid's cart, and when Zana left the group to go back to Tabur while the rest went on to explore the valley, Jamshid pinned the blame on him. Much of the beginning of the session was taken by discussing what to do, with the group ultimately just deciding to pick up on exploring the abandoned farmsteads in the valley, since there was one more abandoned peasant commune to check out. Also they geared up, namely buying a large number of iron spikes to use against any possible jinn they may encounter.

As an aside, a note on Zana's situation. Long term imprisonment isn't really a practice in the Enlightened Empire, at least for anyone who isn't an antimartyr heretic; rather, Zana is in jail pending the trial, which is to happen one in game week from the day of the previous session. Jamshid is also in jail pending the trial. At the trial, testimony of witnesses and associates of the accused and accuser will be brought forth to testify, and if there is any inconsistency in testimony then Zana can possibly be tried by fire, to suss out the truth. If Zana is found guilty, then he will be publicly lashed, branded as an arsonist, and fined. If Zana is found not guilty, then Jamshid will be publicly lashed and fined. If the truth comes out that Kusa is the one who actually set the fire, then Kusa will be publicly lashed, branded as an arsonist, and fined. That's just how it be!

Once the group decided what to do, they set off for the road, in the process meeting Coro the Esoterian, a new player's character who brought along with them a ragged old camel. They followed the road north, the one that leads ultimately to Humakuyun on the sea, first stopping by the little compound of Parsani's farming family to let them know about the kallikantzaroi and headless bull thing that they encountered at the abandoned farmstead they went to previously. After this quick stop, they went on, passing by a fork in the road, one path leading north to Humakuyun and the other leading east to the ragged village of Broken Huts, which I totally didn't steal from Gus L.'s Prison of the Hated Pretender. Sticking to the northern path, they eventually came upon the only remaining farmstead to investigate: a small walled compound surrounded by fields, a waist high mud brick wall encircling it. On the way there I didn't roll a single random wilderness encounter so they just got a nice wilderness stroll it seems.

The compound is a small oval shaped thing, with a little goat pen off to one side, a small copse of trees, a well in the middle, an outhouse, and a main hut where the family presumably lived. The group first set about corralling the goats into the pen and closing it back up, because a number of them had escaped and were running amok in the compound. Manchugo and Rohm'Daan went to investigate the trees, because they were swaying in the wind in such a way that caught their attention, but other than finding a little bright green caterpillar on a branch they didn't find anything. Though once Manchugo turned away from the copse of trees, a strange sound like a high pitched laugh filled the air, which caught their attention but they didn't really do anything about.

Manchugo next went over to the outhouse, but knocking on the door just prompted a loud hissing that they chose not to investigate further. They assumed it to be a snake that was using the outhouse, and didn't want to intrude on their privacy. At the same time, Rohm'Daan poured a bit of goat's milk that Coro harvested from the goats into the well, which did nothing.

This is just what came up when I googled "skinless people sitting"

With the area outside seemingly fully explored, the group next decided to go into the main house building. The first thing they saw upon entering was the large wooden table off to the side, with a family of four arrayed around it, all completely missing their skin. At this point, I did a bit of a small infodump about the nasnas, who it seemed were the most likely culprit for removing the family's skin. The group did a quick look around the rest of the room, seeing the large rug on the floor, the two beds, the hearth with four chairs arrayed around it, the faint hint of a footprints on the floor, and the opening to a sloping passageway seemingly leading to the basement. Before going any further, they took the skinless family and buried them outside the compound with a respectful little ceremony, similarly to how they treated the other dead peasants they found at the last abandoned farm.

Returning to the building, they decided to go down into the basement. After crawling down the low ceiling sloping passageway to the basement, they discovered that it was a storage place for cured meats, including a number of slaughtered and cured goats or cuts of goat hanging from the ceiling. There was a little pile of dirt on the wall opposite the doorway leading back up, and a locked door off to the side. Ishthyromeda poked at the dirt with one of her weapons, dislodging the pile and revealing an opening behind it. At the same time, Rohm'Daan and Manchugo investigated one of the hanging goats because it made a strange clinking sound on the inside when poked. They ended up cutting open the goat, causing ten drachmae to clatter to the dirt floor below! At the same time, a group of four giant ants crawled out of the tunnel, although they did not seem hostile. Coro and Rohm'Daan set about feeding them some of the goat milk and meat, to calm them down and keep them there.

It wasn't nearly as bad as this

Ishthyromeda decided to crawl through the tunnel the ants came out of, ending up in another square room where a good half of the walls had been dug out with both ant mandibles and shovels, with a doorway on one side that had a broken down door and four ant tunnels forking out of the chamber in different directions. As she approached the broken down door, with a candle in hand for light, Manchugo decided to knock on the locked door, hearing the scrambling of human feet on the other side. When Ishthyromeda heard the knocking through the broken down doorway, she went back to the tunnel she crawled through to notify the group that it was the same room connected by both doors. The group then concocted a plan: Ish, Rohm'Daan, and Parsani would approach from the room connected by the broken down door, while Coro would guard the sloping passageway back up, and Manchugo would continue knocking to distract the inhabitants of the room.

What Rohm'Daan and Ish saw when they entered the room, however, was not a hostile group of creatures, but three nasnas cowering in the corner from the sound of the knocking. Rohm'Daan went over to unlock the door, letting Coro and Manchugo in once they realized that the nasnas weren't going to fight them. They then attempted to let the nasnas know that they weren't going to hurt them, offering them food and attempting to speak to them and communicate with them by writing, but the creatures' fear stopped them from eating in the adventurers' presence, and their half formed voice boxes stopped them from verbally communicating. It took Coro casting a charm person spell on one of them, which the creature failed the saving throw for, for them to respond with simple nods for yes and shaking of the head for no. But at this point, it was getting late in the day, so they left the terrified creatures in the basement and set up camp outside, in the low lying mud brick walls of the compound.

Treasure Acquired

10 drachmae

Non Treasure XP Acquired

20 XP each for burying the skinless family, since I gave XP for burying dead peasants last time.

15 XP each for coordinating the approach of the nasnas room, just because it illustrated good group coordination

10 XP for Coro for charming the nasnas

Total: 35 XP/45 for Coro

Six Horror Monsters for Underneath

 I love horror, as a genre with its own tropes and aesthetics and as a general vibe or atmosphere. While most of the stuff on this blog has been primarily "fantasy", I think it is probably apparent that my love of horror and spooky stuff generally suffuses my creative work. I actually honestly think that the stark genre divisions between fantasy, horror, science fiction, etc. that exist today are both unrepresentative of the realities of fantastical fiction and honestly bad to the kind of cross pollination and creative admixture that makes really interesting fiction, but that's beside the point. The point is, I finally got around to making and running a primarily horror tabletop game last year, and this post is gonna be all about one part of it.

I wrote the scenario for and ran the game with the ruleset Underneath, created by Martin O. over at the Goodberry Monthly blog. It's a fantastic, effective, and simple ruleset that really grabbed me the first time I read it at the suggestion of a friend of mine, and I knew right away that it was what I wanted to use as the foundation for my game scenario. Below are six monsters that I wrote for the scenario, which as an aside I've been calling More Than Regulation in my notes, all statted up + described using the format described in the original Underneath rules post. For a basic explanation, monsters in Underneath are primarily defined by their Hit Dice, which are both the number of successful hits from the players it takes to subdue them and also the number of d6s that the monster gets to roll to injure the players. Each die has a 3 in 6 chance of success, so the referee rolls all the d6s, counts how many successes the monster rolled, and then goes from there. Monsters also have an "Insight Threshold", which is the mechanic that really made me fall in love with the game. Rather than having a sanity counter that slowly spirals down and down a la Call of Cthulhu (which, as an aside, I really want to run sometime soon), Underneath has Insight, which steadily climbs higher and higher, revealing new realities when it hits certain thresholds. The insight threshold on a monster is the level of insight that the character has to have to see the uh... well, it might not be the "true" appearance, if you catch my drift. Etc, etc. I really love that mechanic, it's super cool, reminds me a lot of the similarly named insight mechanic from Bloodborne.

So anyway! More Than Regulation is a horror scenario set in the present day in the fictional town of Bone Lick, Wisconsin, situated between Milwaukee and the southern border of the state, on the other side of a foggy marshy wetland that definitely doesn't actually exist in that part of Wisconsin but yknow that's whatever. The town's biggest employer, the main factory of a certain Sweetie Jay's Peanut Butter Company, has recently been temporarily closed pending an investigation by health inspectors from Milwaukee after a few employees have come up dead under very mysterious circumstances. The health inspectors are gonna take a few days to get there, but everyone in town knows that nothing is really gonna come of it; the cops haven't said anything about the situation and have even left the spouses of the deceased in the dark, and the Sweetie Jay's company has its fingers in a lot of pots in the area. The goal of the scenario is for the players to find out as much as they can about what's going on before making their way into the Sweetie Jay's factory to take things into their own hands before the health inspectors get there and cover everything up.

Unfortunately I wasn't able to finish the scenario, though that may change at some point, some of my players expressed an interest in finishing the game over discord. I wanted it to just be a one shot but it ended up being like three or four sessions before scheduling problems caused it to stop continuing.

I described my inspirations for the scenario as being Karl Marx, Franz Kafka, David Lynch, and Junji Ito. I really want to release it sometime, though I should probably polish it up before then. Anyway, here's six monsters from the scenario! These aren't all of the monsters I wrote up for it, I just wanted to do six of them as a bit of a sample I guess.

All art in this post is by me

SHUDDERING BUG CLOT 

Hit Dice: 1

Insight Threshold: 3 

Low Insight Appearance: A very large cockroach. Sometimes encountered rolling around a mostly empty jar of peanut butter. 

Description: A shivering mass of chitinous limbs seemingly stuffed haphazardly into a congealed blob of wet peanut butter. Leaves a trail as it crawls on the ground. Smells much too clean for how it appears. 

Injuries 

(1 Hit): Scratch: The thing’s wretched claws dig into your flesh. -1 Body. 

CRAWLING FLAVOR TENDRIL 

Hit Dice: 1 

Insight Threshold: 1 

Low-Insight Appearance: A very large slug of a sickeningly orange hue. The smell of msg and steamy water. A mane of thick noodles. 

Description: Desperation against the teeth. A thick goop of powder and water combined into a clawing hand slinking along the ground. It doesn’t want to be eaten. 

Injuries

(1 Hit): The Flavor: It fills your nose. -1 Instinct. 

AQUEOUS SLUDGE NYMPH 

Hit Dice: 1 

Insight Threshold: 3 

Low-Insight Appearance: A tendril of rope or vine, caked completely in an oozing algal skin, moving about in the water with unusual purpose, but you can easily explain that away with the currents of the marsh. 

Description: A clump of something gooey and wet, presumably some other color before its time rotting in the swamp. It is a sickeningly slick blackness which cloys to any surface it touches, the void broken only by the myriad simple insectile limbs which claw at the air and water and the single plastic baby doll face peeking out from the sludge. 

Injuries 

(1 Hit): Half-Remembered Depths of Childhood: The sludge seeping into your pores draws forth the hazy recollections of childhood trauma. -1 Empathy. 

A SPOUSE POSSESSED 

Hit Dice: 1 

Insight Threshold: 4 

Low-Insight Appearance: A woman or a man, tears streaming down their face, their clothes tattered and their hair disheveled. They hold a knife in their hands. 

Description: A vague and shadowy thing looms over them. The memory of what they’ve lost, the hopeful memories of what could have been. All of it was stolen so that the woman in the factory could get some cash. The shadowy thing digs its claws into their shoulders. It could happen to you too. It could happen to anyone. 

Injuries 

(1 Hit): Nothing to Lose Anymore: While sobbing uncontrollably, the poor spouse lunges for you, trying to dig their blade into your flesh, your flesh that reminds them too much of the one that they love. -1 EMPATHY. 

KNOTTED RAT THING 

Hit Dice: 1 

Insight Threshold: 3 

Low-Insight Appearance: A very fat rat with a long worm-like tail. 

Description: A messy knot of long slimy hairs, slick with water, or is it spit? Small flecks of nail clippings poke out from between the nasty strands, as the thing bares its still all too rodent-like teeth, a full set of rat teeth in this alien environment. Its tail is a raw electrical wire, spitting sparks like mad. 

Injuries 

(1 Hit): Slimy Shock: The thing clambers onto you, its live wiring making contact with your skin, the disgusting spittle of its hair conducting the current into your flesh. -1 RESOLVE. 

WIDE EYED HOPPER 

Hit Dice: 1 

Insight Threshold: 3 

Low-Insight Appearance: A very large cricket, with a much too loud chirp. 

Description: Two gargantuan cricket legs that tower over the average person when outstretched whilst jumping. A pair of crazed and fearful eyes floating above, the iris drawn in leaving only the depths of the pupil void within. 

Injuries 

(1 Hit): The Deep Dark Depths: The thing stares into your eyes, ensnaring you for just a moment. As it hops around, you can do nothing but follow the blackness within its pupils. -1 INSTINCT. 

I just realized that all of these are 1 HD monsters, I swear I wrote up monsters with more than 1 it just so happened that the ones I wanted to share only have 1.

Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 11 (Lamia Noble to Mite)

 Hey! It's been a bit since the last time I did one of these. But I am deadset on finishing the Fiend Folio review series by the end of the summer. I think I can do it!!! And with this post, we're roughly halfway done with the monsters too! So let's just get into it!

Lamia Noble

★☆☆☆☆

Dang, off to a not so good start. I really don't like the tendency to have monsters that are just another, already established monster but more powerful; not a fan of the Neo Otyugh, not a fan of the Margoyle though at one time I kinda was, etc. It feels a bit different when it's well executed, but here it just is not. The lamia noble is a leader type for lamias, which were originally in the Monster Manual as monsters with the torsos of human women and the lower bodies of big cats. Here, however, lamia nobles have the lower bodies of snakes (which is cool), but they can be either male or female, and their abilities vary by sex with males being fighters and females being magic users. That's really cringe. Also, lamia nobles can disguise themselves as humans, but it says that "intelligent humanoids will always be able to penetrate the disguise", and then in the next paragraph it says that humans and demihumans of high enough level have a chance to identify them, all of which is just incredibly clumsy and annoying. They can also take away points of wisdom, and if the character goes below 3 wisdom then they are under the lamia noble's thrall... that's just a very underpowered charm ability. Why not just have it be a saving throw? So stupid. I like evil snake women, I don't like evil snake women or men with vaguely defined disguise powers and really weak charm abilities that have no real distinct identity. The note that they "are given to outbursts of senseless violence" is fun though.

Lava Children

★★★★☆

OKAY HEAR ME OUT. I know that these are one of the Fiend Folio monsters very commonly made fun of and mocked, but I honestly think that they are really surreally fascinating. The offspring of earth spirits and fire spirits, lava children are like elemental mutant mules with an uncanny appearance and unnatural powers. They have a broad shouldered body with pale skin, but their hands have fingers tipped with long sharp claws and their faces look like constantly smiling children. I especially love the illustration that goes across the bottom of the page, where its shown that not only do the lava children have childlike appearances they are all exactly identical. These things are so creepy!!! And it seems that the folks over at Paizo felt somewhat similarly, when they included the lava children in their book of often maligned old school monsters, Misfit Monsters Redeemed. I honestly don't think they need "redeeming" though; they're already really cool! In terms of powers, they fight with their claws and bite, which is wonderfully animalistic for something so human looking, and it is explicitly stated that metal doesn't exist for them. Not that they are just immune to metal weapons, no, metal phases through them as if it doesn't exist, as if the lava children exist on a parallel plane only vaguely intersecting with the prime material. That is just so cool!!! It also means that their attacks ignore metal armor, which is cool. Most of the rest of their description is pretty much what one expects for an AD&D humanoid race, describing the types of leaders that they have (which, for the record, are mostly fighters but large enough groups also include magic users and clerics, with a note about rumors that their leaders are triple classed fighters/magic users/clerics), which I can really take or leave, it doesn't do anything for me here, feels very generic. The implication of a society that can support trained warriors, wizards, and priests is kinda weird to me, I don't know if it jives with how I read these creatures. One last note: their language is described as "sibilant", which is such a cool and delightful additional detail.

Lizard King

★★☆☆☆

A lot of what I said about the lamia noble applies here. I'm not a fan of monsters that are just another monster but more powerful, the infatuation with cataloging humanoid leader types in AD&D most of the time doesn't do much for me especially if it's way too detailed, etc etc. The lizard king is alright though, for what it is. It's just a more powerful, more intelligent, and "more human" (that's what the description says) lizard man that rules over other lizard men. It gets an extra star over the lamia noble though because, for one, it is way simpler and more evocative than the lamia noble is, the lamia noble sacrifices anything interesting for overthought mechanics and generic vibes. Of note, the lizard king demands HUMAN SACRIFICES from the lizard men it governs, and if they don't provide human sacrifices then he will start taking his own followers as sacrifices. That's fun! They also wield a trident, which is a cool iconic weapon that deals extra damage on certain circumstances, though its bullshit that the extra damage and special abilities only count for when a lizard king wields them; the players should be able to get them too! Also the art just looks really cool, I love the tongue sticking out.

Magnesium Spirit

★★★☆☆

I'm gonna be honest, this is the first time I've read this monster's description. I think I just skipped over it a lot since it doesn't have an illustration! The magnesium spirit is actually a super interesting monster, one that I think I could see myself building a whole scenario around. The description mentions that there are only three or four of these things, summoned to the prime material plane ages ago by a powerful sorcerer, and they are constantly in search of humans to possess in order to perform the ritual to send them back to their plane of origin. That is really cool and evocative! Visuals wise, they're also pretty cool, a column of pale flame with a wispy tale, and it mentions how they move faster than even characters that have had the haste spell cast on them and that they can do a flash of blinding light. Love that stuff, super cool. What is not so cool is the extremely detailed stuff all about the magnesium spirit's powers, the detailed process of them merging with a human host to perform the ritual, how many levels a host has to have for the ritual to go forward, etc etc. It suffers so much from the kind of rules bloat that plagues a lot of AD&D monsters. I'm really not gonna get into how complex the whole thing is; suffice to say that there are so many hurdles the magnesium spirit has to go through that it is really a miracle if it is even at all able to do the one goal it has. I think I would love to use the magnesium spirit in a game, but what I would use would be a much simpler version; rather than tying so many things to player level, perhaps I would specify that they seek to take over a magic user to perform the ritual. I would give this monster four or perhaps even five stars if the description weren't so overwrought.

Lookit their sad little face!

Mantari

★★★☆☆

The mantari is basically just a big airborne stingray. Not much more than that, and honestly that's alright! It attacks with its tail, which is described as "not poisonous" but instead acting on the victim's nervous system which uh... that means it is venomous, actually, it just has a neurotoxin instead of a haemotoxin, but yknow that's beside the point. Unlike the real world stingray's more defensive bestinged tail, the mantari uses its tail like a spear, pointing it at a victim and diving at them from the air. Also if you get hit twice by the mantari's tail it deals four times the damage. Jeeze!! That's a bit overkill honestly. I love the note that they usually prey on giant rats, it's such a lovely little piece of dungeon ecology, which is doubly asserted by the mention that their "preferred haunts are dirty dungeon chambers where its prey abounds". I love that! I think I'll definitely use the mantari in a certain dungeon I'm working on that will hopefully get some use. One thing I really don't like though is that they are 85% aggressive toward other creatures and humans. I just like the nice 2d6 reaction roll! Anyway, these things just seem like animals, albeit ambush predators; I don't think they should be so aggressive.

Meazel

★★★★☆

The meazel isn't anything really all that special, but what it is its pretty good at! These little shits are yet another kind of awful small humanoid who will do awful things to you underground, but they're at least a bit more fun and, more importantly, waaaaay simpler than the godawful jermlaine that didn't need to have such a long description. These guys are little thieves, with the same abilities as a level 4 thief, and often they fight with garrotes which is pretty cool, though the first illustration depicts one holding a sword. I really love the note that they are the enemies of orcs and kobolds, and that "most creatures of the underworld will attack meazels, for they have a nasty reputation even among dungeon denizens". Everyone HATES them. That's just so fun! I would love to have them as a faction in a dungeon. I similarly love that they don't recognize the value of gems, instead dumping any gemstones they get from the people they capture and eat along with the bones in big bags outside their lairs. That's so evocative and fun, and it provides a cool opportunity for players to acquire treasure without combat. Also they apparently almost all have a noncontagious skin disease that makes them look leprous. They are just so nasty!

Meenlock

★★★★★

I'm kinda breaking my own rule here, because I really how long and overly detailed in terms of specific creature behaviors the meenlock description is, but I honestly think that the monster's vibe and atmosphere still shine through to the point that I'm willing to give them a five out of five despite the overwrought description. Basically, meenlocks are awful little humanoids that dwell in mysterious deep shafts in the ground that are so dark and twist around in strange directions that you can't see the bottom, completely lined with moss so movements are silent in them. They have psychic abilities that allow them to create false smells, which they use to defend their tunnels by making it smell like there are rotting corpses at the bottom, and they can communicate telepathically. If the players open up one of their shafts and go down in, they will find the nest lair of the meenlocks at the bottom, in a little cave; the meenlocks will fight to defend their lair using their claws that have paralytic venom, but they are scared by light so their first priority is putting any lights the party has out. If the players open up one of their shafts and then leave without going down in, then the meenlocks will crawl out of the shaft and follow the party, sneaking so as to not be found, and they will select one member of the party to basically psychically harass into being stressed and paranoid, and then when the party goes to rest the meenlocks will come by and KIDNAP THEM, taking them back to the mossy shaft where they are TRANSFORMED INTO A MEENLOCK. It is so pulpy and fun! They seem a lot like awful little humanoids like Shaver's deros, or like children's bogeymen. My only problem is how overwrought their description is. In fact, this is one monster where I think I'd like to see my good friend the Cosmic Orrery make a FKR version! The vibes are all there, just gotta be certain about the execution.

A steam mephit

Mephits

★★★☆☆

I'm going to be reviewing the mephits as one creature even though there's four subtypes, mostly because in general there is a lot in common between them. I did it before with some of the other monsters that had a bunch of subtypes, it's alright. Mephits aren't really my favorite personally, but I can see why they exist in the game. They are the, to use the description's wording, "evil messengers and errand runners of the powerful creatures of the Lower Planes", which is definitely a sort of conceptual niche that is needed in fantasy games like D&D. Personally I think I'd be more inclined to use things with more literary vibes than the elemental themed mephits; like, I dunno, maybe basing things on Lovecraft's servitors of the outer gods or Poe's imps of the perverse. In fact, why not just use imps, which were literally in the Monster Manual? Okay okay, there is one thing that I really love about how the mephits are described, which honestly let me just quote it in its entirety:

"Mephits are connoisseurs of the vulgar and tasteless; they share an extraordinarily twisted sense of humor (to a mephitic, the sight of a creature writhing in agony is excruciatingly funny). They delight particularly in tormenting the helpless. If they can obtain them (and it is usual that they do) they will wear clothes of the most garish design and color possible. They are often seen puffing upon smoking rolls of exceedingly foul smelling dried vegetation. They adopt a strutting gait and have shrill voices."

They are evil assholes with a mean sense of humor and they're described as stoners who dress in gaudy outfits. I bet they listen to breakcore or 100 Gecs or something (I really like 100 Gecs actually so that's a good thing lol). Now, for the sake of brevity, let me just summarize my thoughts on the four subtypes of mephits. In general, I really don't think there needs to be so many subtypes, and since the publication of the Folio there have been many, many more. It is typical of the kind of overly taxonomic gygaxian impulse to just constantly add new variations on monsters as canon "subtypes", "breeds", etc., and I am decidedly not a fan. However, here's how I feel about the four types of mephits described here:

Fire Mephit: Pretty basic, they're always on fire so touching them deals damage, they have a breath weapon of fire that they can change the shape of between either a jet of flame or a blanket of flame, I guess that changes how many targets it can hit? Also they can do heat metal and magic missile. Pretty generic.

Lava Mephit: These guys are delightfully gloopy, their illustration has such a shitty expression on its face, even its nose is drooping with dripping lava. They're not actually made of lava either; lava mephits instead sweat lava, it's described as oozing from their skin. I really like that, it's so messed up. The lava sweat obviously produces a lot of heat, so they can be detected from a good distance away, touching them deals damage, etc. They can also spit lava and their touch dissolves/melts stuff and they can shape change into a pool of lava. A bit too many powers in my opinion, but pretty alright!

Smoke Mephit: Honestly these guys are just a reskinned fire mephit. The description even directly compares them. Rather than spitting fire, their breath weapon is a "sooty ball of smoke" that can also blind you in addition to dealing damage, and they can turn invisible and use the spell dancing lights. Also when they die they "cough up" 1 point of fire damage to everyone nearby, which is kinda fun.

Steam Mephit: Like the lava mephit, these guys aren't actually made out of steam but instead sweat boiling steamy water, which I really quite like. Their breath weapon is a jet of scalding water; more importantly though, they can also summon a magical rainstorm of boiling rain, that is treated as an ice storm but just with the temperature reversed to really hot. That's an amazingly messed up power. I think I might steal that for a different monster sometime.

I kinda hate that I felt the need to write so much about the mephits. My favorite ones are the lava and steam mephits.

Mephits are also our first monster in this post to have originally been featured in the Fiend Factory column in White Dwarf! Notably, however, you will not find them if you go looking for the name "mephit"... That's because they're actually new types of IMPS. I WAS RIGHT. I SAID THEY SHOULD JUST BE IMPS AND THEY ORIGINALLY WERE!!! I have no idea why they were changed from just being new subtypes of imp to being a completely separate type of monster in the transition from Factory to Folio, but that's just what happened. The four types are all here, but lava mephits are instead called molten imps. In terms of powers and abilities, they are roughly the same, though the powers are stated in much simpler language in the Factory versions, which is very welcome. The smoke imp/mephit is described as oozing smoke in a similar fashion to how the steam and lava/molten mephits/imps ooze their respective material, so that's super cool. Also Don Turnbull remarks that cautious DMs may want to avoid having certain types of imps in the same encounter together, saying that the steam imp's rain of boiling water and the molten imp's lava would interact in really bad ways. I say screw that, the awful clouds of steam and the sudden reaction of the water with lava would be great for an encounter! I will say, also, that the Fiend Folio version has a lot more personality, with the mentions of their gaudy clothing and awful senses of humor. Normally I find the Folio versions to be relatively worse than the originals, but here there is much more personality in the Folio version.

Mezzodaemon

★★☆☆☆

Mezzodaemons are Okay. I really love the illustration, like I really really love it, its such a good creature, but basically everything else is generic as hell. It feels almost like they were just created to fill in a gap in the AD&D cosmology so that there would be monsters for the planes between the nine hells and the abyss.  They really have no distinctive or unique powers, abilities, or flavor; they just have great strength, fight with their "horny hands and talons" (a bit of unfortunate word choice there) or sometimes with magical weapons, they can use basically any magical item and can cast a handful of specific spells, they're immune to nonmagical weapons and take half damage from acid and cold and fire, they have magic resistance, they can see infrared and ultraviolet, and they have unique names that if someone else knows then they can control them. All of that is basically the same stuff that every other fiendish creature in AD&D has. The name thing, the magic resistance, the immunities, the spells, it's pretty much the same as a given demon or devil, and pretty much all the time the demon or devil will be more interesting or iconic. Really sucks though, the illustration is great.

Mite

★★☆☆☆

Yet another awful little humanoid that will do awful things to the player characters in the dungeon? These guys are getting a bit repetitive at this point. These ones are actually specified as being related to the jermlaine and the snyad, which we will get to in a future post; yet another instance of annoying gygaxian naturalism, feeling the need to establish these unnecessary genetic relationships between monsters. I personally don't really benefit from having a taxonomy of very similar awful little humanoids that live in dungeons, at least not the way its done here. Mites capture adventurers with traps, tripwires, etc., beat them half unconscious and rob them, strip them of their armor, tie them up, and then drag them to a main corridor of the dungeon to be killed by a wandering monster. I guess the mites are on better terms with the other dungeon inhabitants than the meazels are. I really like the detail that adventurers can sometimes hear them scurrying around in their little tunnels that wrap around the larger dungeon corridors, that's cool. Other than that, though, I honestly think that the meazel is a much more interesting alternative. This one has a great illustration by Russ Nicholson, though.

The humble mite is also our only other Fiend Factory original for today. And, other than the uh, very lackluster illustration, the Factory version is much better. All the basic beats are there; mites live in small tunnels all around dungeon corridors, adventurers can sometimes hear them scurry around in there, they use traps and tripwires to capture adventurers and beat them up and steal all their stuff before leaving them back in the dungeon to be killed by wandering monsters. However, and this is an important thing, there's no mention of the stupid forced genetic relationship with the jermlaine and snyads. I know that the jermlaine were Gygax's creation, so of course he would force other people's monsters to have explicit "canonical" relationships with his. Typical Gary move. Also, there is one thing in the Fiend Factory version's description that is so good I simply can't believe it was left out from the Folio version. Since the tunnels are so small that most human sized creatures can't effectively fight in them, the most effective way to combat mites is to fill their tunnels with smoke. I love that!!! It's such a cool, creative weakness that really feels like something adventurers could feasibly figure out, AND it's evocative of bees. You just have to find all the openings to their tunnels, cover up all but one of them, fill the tunnel with smoke, and then bada bing bada boom you can fight them as they come out. Really fun! If that had been included in the Folio version, I honestly probably would have given them three stars.

Hey so I'm really sorry about the length of this one! I just really didn't want to break up the letter M and it turned out that I apparently had a lot to say about some monsters that I felt mostly mixed on. Well I hope you are having a lovely day and stay tuned for the next entry in the Fiend Folio review series, where we will do the letters N and O!