Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 17 (FINAL!!! Umpleby to Yellow Musk Creeper)

It is time... the FINAL part of the unnecessarily long-running Fiend Folio saga on this here blog! Won't take too much time here, check out the first entry in this series, and here's a link to the most recent!

 

Umpleby

★★★☆☆

The umpleby is a real weirdo, and I know that's saying something with Fiend Folio monsters! An 8 foot tall hairy humanoid that will ally with anyone that gives it food, drink, and treasure (it loves precious metals and gems, for some reason), and with two hyper-specific powers: it is able to discharge strong static electricity, and it ties knotted nets out of its own fur that it stores around its waist (which aren't electric at all, seemingly). I really like the idea of a static electricity hair monster! For every day, the umpleby has 50 points of damage that it can distribute among the static attacks it makes as it pleases. This resets to 50 whenever it rests; I'd like to think that they have to rub themselves on something to get the static charge back up. The umpleby demanding a cut of treasure (on top of food and water) does prompt the question (on the part of the players) of how long you want to keep it around, if its electrical power and nets and (presumably) knowledge of the dungeon is so good but it means you take less treasure. I just struggle to really understand the point of the umpleby's treasure fascination otherwise, it isn't really described. Is it like a magpie-style fixation on shiny things that they take back to a nest?

 

The umpleby first appeared in the Fiend Factory column, and with a much more dramatic illustration. The description is similar, although it notes that umplebies are of low intelligence (also noted in the Folio description), but are "swift and calculating" when it comes to treasure. Also, the Factory umpleby with accompany an adventuring party whether they want it to or not. A much more unwanted presence, this version of the umpleby! The Factory umpleby also has a lair which it stores treasure in (answering at least some of the unaddressed questions from the Folio version), the location of which it will never reveal unless charm monster is cast on it; even when threatened with death, the umpleby will only... giggle. Don Turnbull's description says that the "travelling companion" type of monster was apparently becoming very popular, although this is the first time I've encountered it. Turnbull liked it more than Little Old Men and LOLITS (little old lady in tennis shoes) which... sure are specific images to refer to!

 

For some reason, a version of the umpleby illustration without a net was used later in the Fiend Factory as the illustration for a completely unrelated monster, the Time Freezer, whose powers you can probably guess.

 

Urchin

★☆☆☆☆

Not gonna lie, this whole time I was under the impression that the urchins in the Fiend Folio were literal sea urchins, and they do look like normal sea urchins, but they are actually urchin-like predatory monsters that shoot spines as ranged weapons and have precious gems inside of them. There are five different colors of urchin that increase in deadliness and gem value as you go up. IDK, I want to like urchins with mysterious gems inside of them but this just feels more video gamey and less interesting than IRL sea urchins. Sea urchins are fascinating animals!! And anyway, sea urchin eggs are a delicacy in Japan and other places so why not just make the treasure that nice slimy yellow stuff instead of mystery gems.

 

I didn't want to take a picture of the whole (unnecessarily long) stat block, so here's just the fun title font that they used in the Fiend Factory

Urchins also were first featured in the Fiend Factory, in an identical form. At the very least, the description is mercifully short. Don Turnbull notes that the guy who submitted them should hopefully realize that the silver urchin is an incredibly difficult and dangerous beast for players to have to deal with!

 

Vision

★★☆☆☆

The creation of a high-level illusionist gone wrong, the vision is a being that looks like a shadow (which, well, there's already a monster called a shadow, so why this needed to Also exist is beyond me), and which doesn't attack physically but rather makes characters (on a failed 3d6+3 vs INT roll) believe that they have aged ten years! EGAD!! To be completely honest, I actually love that power, and I almost wish the shadow already had it to begin with. I don't think a vision can kill you in any way though? You don't keep aging until you believe you're dead and then keel over, no end point is described other than the effect dissipating if the vision is killed (which is only possible through the use of silver, magical weapons, or certain cleric or illusionist spells). Really, this is a 1 star monster, but I like the power enough to bump it up, just wish it was done more interestingly.

 

Vodyanoi

★★☆☆☆

Vodyanoi, or wodniki, or a bunch of different names, are Slavic water spirits that appear in the folklore of a bunch of different eastern European countries (vodyanoi is the name in Russia, while wodnik is the name in Poland). Here, for some reason, they are rendered as slimy aquatic relatives of the umber hulk. I don't really understand why they did this? Mechanically they are uninteresting; big hefty brutes that have multiple hard-hitting attacks. Their only mildly interesting power is being able to summon 1d20 electrical eels once per day... but only with a 50% chance of success. Boooooo, just let them summon the eels goddammit!! I loooooove the Russ Nicholson illustration, it is an incredibly iconic and nasty looking fish-man with pincers around the mouth, but vodyanoii could have been so much more interestingly. Just like the vision, gets an extra star, in this case for the drawing.

 

Volt

★★★★☆

Here we go!! While not one of the most iconic weirdies in the Folio, the volt is a pretty nasty little bugger that I just love the vibe of. A shaggy grey ball with two big bulbous eyes, a mouth full of fangs, and a long sinewy tail tipped with an electricity-producing organ! ...What's with the electrical creatures toward the end of the Folio? Anyway, the volt attaches to the neck of its victim and sucks their blood while simultaneously striking the victim's head with a jolt of electricity from its tail. It doesn't even need an attack roll once its attached! One of the two illustrations for the volt features the tail shocking a helmeted warrior, which brings to mind whether wearing a helmet would actually make the attack worse (since it would be, presumably, made of metal), but that isn't touched on in the description. I just love how terrible this thing is!

 

The volt is also our next Fiend Factory original! These last several monsters sure have a high density of Factory features! The Factory volt is more or less the same, with simpler wording than the version in the Folio. In his comments, Don Turnbull compares the volt to stirges (another favorite classic D&D monster!!) in terms of being a useful low-level enemy, albeit in this case with a fun electrical theme, and also notes that one strategy to fighting a volt could be having someone in the party grab onto the tail (with a "heavily-gloved hand") while the others hack away at the head latched onto the victim's neck. I also just like the delightfully scuzzy illustration it has in the Factory column :)

 

Vortex

★★★★☆

A pretty interesting take on an air elemental, the vortex is what it says on the tin: a living whirlwind that can catch a poor victim in its gusts and spin them around until they die. The vortex only deals a small amount of damage per turn to the guy caught in it, with the sole exception of the growing change (+5% each round) of the speed of rotation growing so quickly that the victim dies instantly. The vortex's real form is a small grapefruit-sized sphere that bobs and weaves around the center of the whirlwind, and which is very hard to hit; plus, it cannot be killed by the person caught inside of it, only by someone outside. This is honestly way more interesting than the normal air elemental! I'd be much more inclined to include vortices in my game than the vague cloud-creatures that usually pass for air monsters. 

 

In Fiend Factory, the vortex is instead called the WHIRLER, which is a much more fun and whimsical name. The second sentence in the whirler's description notes that "it has a deep hatred for human-kind," which is always good to see. The description doesn't mention the little grapefruit-sized true body like the one in the Folio does, but otherwise it is pretty much the same. Don Turnbull says it would be very fun to require players attempting to attack the whirler while a buddy is caught inside be very careful with their rolls lest they hit their companion! "Characters with dexterity lower than 13 need not apply..."

Whipweed

★★★☆☆

A plant-like (but not a plant, which the description basically wastes an entire paragraph to note) monster that has a central spheroid body with eight small legs and roots as well as two long thin whip-like stalks. They dwell underground and don't photosynthesize, instead absorbing nutrients from meat through their roots. This is honestly pretty basic for a mobile carnivorous plant (despite the description claiming otherwise). Nothing super notable mechanically other than the whipweed not dying until the central body is killed (because it can regrow its stalks). I think the idea of a mobile subterranean plant-monster is really cool, but it isn't executed especially interestingly here.

 

Also going by a slightly different name, the Fiend Factory's "Whipper" is... wait a minute, in the Fiend Factory, whipweeds literally are plants! The opening sentence even notes that they are susceptible to spells like control plants! What gives! Anyway, as is the running theme with comparisons between the Factory and the Folio, the version in the Factory is a much leaner, simpler, more effective version of the monster, in terms of mechanical implementation. The illustration is fantastically weird looking, with the two whip-like tendrils twisted and covered with leaves, while the main body down below has a toothsome maw. If this illustration was in the Folio (unfortunately the Folio whipweed doesn't even have an illustration), I would have given it four stars, maybe even five. The vibe communicated by this drawing is so unwholesome.

 

Witherstench

★★★☆☆

Did we need a mangy mostly hairless skunk-relative that constantly emits a foul-smelling odor that all within a certain radius need to save vs. or vomit uncontrollably and leave themselves helpless to attack? Perhaps not... However, I am very glad that we have it anyway :) I always love uncontrollable vomit effects, its such a particularly nasty way to make a character unable to attack/act. Otherwise, nothing super notable about this guy.

 

The witherstench also was a Fiend Factory original! There really are a lot of those this time around, which I guess is only fitting. The description is literally three sentences long. I'll include the whole thing in the screenshot from the PDF. The illustration looks much more like an actual skunk than the mangy squirrel-thing in the Folio. Don Turnbull notes some confusion about the radius of the stink effect, since it is unspecified (I honestly really like that they reprinted people's monsters with no real editing, makes this a much clearer look into the world of late 70s British D&D nerds than if there was more editorial oversight), but also says that it makes for a useful wandering monster, since presumably its lair would be so smelly that nobody would even want to go in without a gas mask!

 

Witherweed

★★★★☆

Another plant-thing, and this one I personally find much more interesting than the whipweed. Immobile, the witherweed grows in big patches (20 sq ft on average but sometimes larger), with 13-24 flailing fronds that, upon a touch, cause the victim to begin to wither into nothing, draining 1d4 points of DEX per attack. If 4 points are drained in a single attack, the victim suffers a nervous seizure for 2 rounds and then has a penalty to their attacks for 5 rounds even after coming to! Holy shit?? A dry pallid plant with flailing fronds that sap dexterity and cause seizures is so specific and messed up. On top of this, the easy answer of just burning the thing presents its own problems; while the fronds won't be able to attack, it does produce a toxic, oily smoke that can only be dissipated by a strong wind (a strong wind which, of course, wouldn't exist in a dungeon!) or by waiting four hours. Breathing in this smoke is a save or die effect, which I do find a bit cheap, but I like how even the obvious way of countering the witherweed presents its own problems. This thing is a fantastical plant that still feels like a plant, and I really appreciate that!

 

The witherweed is also from the Fiend Factory column! The description there is pretty much identical to the one in the Folio, but (again) much simpler with its explanation of what actually matters about the monster (it squeezes the physical description, the effects of burning it, and how its DEX-draining/seizure-inducing attack works into one paragraph where the Folio has four). Turnbull says smart players will avoid burning it but instead hack it to pieces so they can take bits of it with them to burn strategically and make monsters throw up, which is a great suggestion!

 

Xill
★★☆☆☆

I want to like the xill, I really do. The illustration is so good, with the weird glassy eyes, four arms, and horns and frills that make it feel like something out of a Frank Frazetta cover for one of the Barsoom novels. However, ultimately, it is basically the same thing as the assassin bug, and you know I have to go to bat for the bug person version. Both the xill and the assassin bug are parasitoids, having to lay their eggs inside a human host for it to gestate; however, unlike the assassin bug, xills are asexual, laying their own eggs with no need for sexual reproduction, and they dwell on the ethereal plane. That, and the xill being listed as "very" intelligent (but I always like to think of assassin bugs as smarter than they're given credit for in the Folio anyway), are the only real differences. Well, that and the xill's description being wayyyyyy too elaborate and long-winded in describing how it snatches up a human host to lay eggs in, how grappling with a four-armed xill works, how their subduing attacks work, etc. It's just too much!! I kept switching between 3 and 2 stars while writing this, but I think ultimately the combination of how unwieldy it is mechanically with the fact that the assassin bug does its thing much better offset how cool I find the illo.

 

I don't even really like this illustration...

Xvart

★☆☆☆☆

Dude we do NOT need yet another race of goblin-like diminutive humanoids. The description for the xvart even says they are "mediary" between kobolds and goblins, like oh my godddddd. I love goblin-types as much as the next gal, but I think the real running theme of this series has to be "okay guys we have enough of them," or at the very least actually make them interesting like the forlarren or the meazel. Xvarts are just gnome lookin' guys with oversized heads that wield small swords or other weapons, some of them have nets, and they sometimes have giant rats and wererats allied with them. They don't even have the rat thing unique to them, the jermlaine already has a rat motif going on. This sucks.

 

Oh god why did this one have to also be from the Fiend Factory column. There, the xvart is instead called a svart, which is a much better name solely on the basis of pronounceability. Also, their head is much more proportional in the accompanying illustration, for some reason. Y'know, now that I think about it, neither of these descriptions mention an oversized head... what is up with the illustration in the Fiend Folio? The description here is very similar, except that the Factory svart apparently despises hobbits, and apparently hobbits like to capture svarts and kobolds and make them fight wait what?? That's an insane little detail to just drop in there. Anyway, apparently these guys (svarts, that is, not xvarts) are taken from a book I haven't heard of before, The Weirdstone of Brisingamen by Alan Garner. Might have to check that one out, I can't help but think I will be much more charitable to a race of little people in a weird fairy-inflected fantasy novel than in D&D.

 

Yellow Musk Creeper (and Zombie, Yellow Musk)

★★★★★

But hey, at least we're ending on a high note!!! Woooooo!! Yellow musk creeper!! I hope its fine to review these two together, since the one is entirely dependent on the other. And, since this is our third plant in this post alone, I guess the real running theme of the end of the Fiend Folio is plants! I'm not even certain there are any other plants in the Folio! There's the algoid and the kelpie, but algae/kelp isn't actually plants (though that is definitely being very nitpicky hehe). Anywho, the yellow musk creeper is a classic and very effective type of monster, a mind-controlling plant. I feel like these days, the niche of mind control/zombification has been taken over by cordyceps-inspired fungi, at least when it isn't some kind of virus or parasitic worm I guess. When a victim gets close enough, the yellow musk creeper puffs a bit of musk-scented dust into their face that brings them into a hypnotic trance, during which they wander deeper into the plant's large structure, so that the creeper can insert roots into their brain. A really haunting visual! This drains points of INT every round, and if your INT gets low enough, you are brought completely under the yellow musk creeper's control and become a yellow musk zombie (which aren't actually undead since they are like, semi-alive, and thus cannot be turned by clerics, but because they are under the control of a plant which is also immune to mind-altering effects they cannot be affected by charm, hold person, etc). The only way to actually defeat a yellow musk creeper is to destroy the bulb buried in the ground beneath the plant, which makes the combat so much more interesting. You don't just have to slice away at the thing or defeat its thralls, you also have to take out a shovel and dig as fast as you can and hope you get to the bulb before your friend becomes a zombie! I also like the small note that yellow musk creepers are often deliberately planted in certain areas to "guard" something. There should honestly be more deliberately planted weaponized plants! Even the witherweed was assumed to just grow naturally in dungeons. I'd love to supplement an evil overlord's lair with a deadly garden!

 

And with that, the Goin' Through the Fiend Folio series comes to a close! But don't fret! Or, well, I doubt you're fretting, but anyway: this won't be the last you see me reviewing monsters on this here blog! After I put together a masterpost linking to all of the Fiend Folio reviews, I intend on making a follow-up going through various monsters from the Fiend Factory column in White Dwarf that didn't make it into the Fiend Folio. Because, for all the unwarranted weird reputation that the Folio has, a lot of real fascinating weirdos didn't quite make the cut! So, keep an eye out for that!

 

Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 16 (Tabaxi to Tween)

It's been way too long, again. I don't know if I really need to dwell on how long its been again. I gotta get over this taking months-long gaps between blogging. Anyway, here's a link to the first post in this series, here's a link to the most recent one, let's go!

Tabaxi
★★★☆☆
Tabaxi have become such an OC D&D staple (what with all the Furries that play D&D of course!) that it's almost weird to encounter them here in a totally different context. They're pretty much what you'd expect from a race of cat people, although as described here they are much closer to roving bands of paleolithic cat-men (nothing more advanced than bone and wood spears, atlatls, etc. are mentioned, and they're only tool-users when they find it convenient) than to the much more modern and social tabaxi that are more prominent these days. Also, they wear no clothes and do not trade because they find it demeaning (I'm torn on this... does that mean no player negotiation with tabaxi, or does it just make negotiating with them more complicated i.e. more interesting?). Also, love the uncanny vibe of the illustration!

Tentamort
★★★★☆
Maybe I just love weird tentacle monsters, so sue me! The tentamort (banger of a name, super unnecessary that the description opens with "its got lots of names, tentamort is just the most common" who cares, that doesn't add anything) is some kind of giant predatory echinoderm with suction cups on the underside that it uses to adhere to dungeon walls, floors, ceilings and slowly crawl along. They also have two long tentacles, one with strong constricting muscles and the other with a long bone needle on the tip that injects a corrosive saliva that melts the insides of a human-sized creature in 2 rounds (it's a bit confusingly worded... it takes 2 rounds to inject and then an additional 2 rounds to completely melt the insides and kill them, if I understand). The tentamort's M.O. is to ensnare a victim in the constricting tentacle and then inject the corrosive saliva with the other. Pretty basic, sure, but very strong conceptually! It evokes real-world animals in a way that I really love, and feels right at home in implied dungeon ecologies that are some of my favorite D&D things. Great critter all around!

Terithran
★★☆☆☆
Whatever magic-user-hating referee created the disenchanter must have loved this thing. It feels like something made specifically to counter magic-happy players, in a way that I'm not terribly interested in. Basically, the terithran is a creature of the ethereal plane that gets annoyed when magic-users cast spells because it causes ripples on the ethereal plane, so they come into the prime material plane to kill M-Us with a bunch of spelled-out supernatural powers like stunning blast, cause serious wounds, transportation (to steal away an M-U to the ethereal plane), etc. The idea of higher plane creatures that get annoyed with magic use is something that at its core interests me a lot, but the expression here is mostly boring. I'd want to take more cues from the real-life lore surrounding psychic phenomena for stuff like that! The terithran reads as a monster aimed at countering specific players with little else interesting going on (plus it's a boring little humanoid, there's so many of those).

The terithran is our first monster of this batch to be originally featured in the Fiend Factory column! Featuring this incredibly unsettling illustration that singularly bumps up the terithran to a 3/5 monster for me. Maybe I'm too susceptible to a cool drawing, but the image implied by a monster goes a long way to how likely I am to use it in my game! Mechanically, it is more or less the same. The description here is more explicit about when it will use its powers, with a bit less wordiness to get across that the terithran seeks to capture powerful magic-users and drag them back to the ethereal plane. Don Turnbull's comments open with "This is one of those creatures which is simpler to run than its description would have us believe." Good to know! The description, both here and in the Folio, does come across as very complicated. He also says he prefers anti-magic creatures like this to "klutz factor" as an added risk for magic use.

Thoqqua (aka Rockworm)
★★☆☆☆
A worm so hot that it melts through rock and ruins the arms and armor of characters when it attacks. Seems a bit redundant to me with the remorhaz also being a worm-creature with a heat-attack, but I guess the remorhaz also has an ice association... which honestly makes it more interesting anyway. It's implied the thoqqua is the larval form of some larger elemental creature which is fun. Pretty much exactly what you'd expect as a "fire worm."

Thork
★★★★☆
I love the thork, but I also just love weird birds in general. Thorks aka boiler birds are copper storks that heat up water inside their bodies to spit as an attack. The imagery of a bird made of metal standing in water with steam rising from its beak is just too good to pass up, and I honestly appreciate that they are explicitly non-hostile, only attacking in self-defense. But they very well might want to defend themselves, because they collect platinum in their subaquatic nests! The choice of platinum is a bit arbitrary and clearly just picked because it is so valuable, but having a valuable treasure protected by these boiling water birds is a great excuse to make players interact with them. Maybe, although this isn't very stork-like, thorks should build elaborate nests out of treasure, just to make it doubly hard to get the stuff out without attracting their ire.

Throat Leech
★★☆☆☆
Pretty basic, a bloodsucking leech that inhabits fresh water, looking like a twig, and if consumed latches onto the back of the throat and sucks blood (1-3 hit points of damage) for 10 melee rounds at which point it is distended with blood and stops sucking. The only way to kill it is with a heated metal rod inserted down the throat, which has a chance of horribly damaging the host's mouth and throat which is fun. But the chance of getting the leech in the first place is only 10%... So many words writing this stuff out, all just on the off chance the players even have to deal with it? I like the basic building blocks here, just wish more was done with it; drinking water hazards are always great!

Throat leeches were also a Factory original! Pretty much the same as in the Folio, except the description is mercifully much shorter. Did someone at TSR require that monster mechanics be written out in the most verbose possible way??? The illustration makes it look like throat leeches go for your throat when you go for a swim, despite what the description puts forward. 

Tiger Fly
★★★☆
The tiger fly is, at is simplest, a sexually dimorphic giant predatory stinging insect. Except, for some reason, they have a human face? Their intelligence is listed as "non-", which does bring to mind the question of just how uncanny it would be to see an explicitly non-thinking human face would be. Male tiger flies have two sharp sickle-like forelimbs they use to attack, and a venomous sting that deals a whopping 4d6 damage; females, on the other hand, have four arms which they use to grab victims, holding them in place to paralyze them with their stinger and lay a parasitoid larva in their body. Parasitoid insects are an absolute favorite of mine (and have cropped up in these reviews before, with the assassin bug!), and the combination of a parasitoid wasp-esque creature with a totally unthinking human face is very freaky. I'm imagining the face of a female tiger fly completely placid and uncanny as she injects her spawn into your abdomen, a fantastic visual! The illustration of a male tiger fly leans more goofy than uncanny, but it is still very fun either way.

Tirapheg
★★★★★
I LOVE THE TIRAPHEG!!! This is one of those monsters that I was introduced to before ever getting my hands on the Fiend Folio proper, via a mention in a Bogleech D&D monster review. And, keeping with the uncanniness implied by the tiger fly, the tirapheg is quite possibly one of the creepiest looking creatures that one could imagine shuffling out of the darkness in the dungeon depths. Seven feet tall, completely naked and hairless, with three heads, only one of which has any actual facial features, three arms, only one of which ends in a hand (and a sharp-clawed one at that), three legs, only one of which ends in a foot, and a large fleshy-lipped mouth with waving tendrils above in the middle of its torso. An inexplicable body horror monstrosity that is described as preferring to eat decayed flesh, the tirapheg is normally shy (this combined with the eating of decayed flesh perhaps implies tiraphegs are decomposers/scavengers? Yet, interestingly, they have average i.e. human-level intelligence) but sometimes will attack adventurers for "no apparent reason" (more accurately what seems like no apparent reason to the players). Additionally, the tirapheg can project illusory copies of itself in combat, which take no damage but can damage opponents, as well as creating a sudden blinding flash of light that causes confusion effects. Tiraphegs seem to be furtive dungeon scavengers, with supernatural abilities that serve to give them opportunities to flee combat and hide away somewhere... and they look like that.

For some reason, in their initial appearance in the Fiend Factory column, the tirapheg was called Lauren. The reader-provided description thankfully explains that Lauren is an anagram of "unreal." OH YEAH I FORGOT TO MENTION, tiraphegs/laurens have a third eye on the back of the head and double-jointed arms that allow them to attack from either direction. That element is the same in both versions. Otherwise, the two versions are much the same, although the Factory version is much simpler. The illustration goes for a more AHH! Real Monsters gross-out sort of vibe than the surreal uncanny of the Folio drawing, and while I think for the vibe I get from the description the Folio illustration is better, I can't help but love the scrappiness of the Factory rendition.

Trilloch
★★☆☆☆
Trillochs are a terrible force from the negative energy plane that thrives on siphoning life-force from dying creatures and uses its field of influence to accelerate death (but it cannot start death). If combat occurs in the presence of a trilloch, all attacks have +1 to-hit and +1 damage, unintelligent monsters are more likely to attack, etc. Trillochs apparently gravitate to especially evil and violent creatures and attaches itself to whatever ends up killing their "host." The basic idea is one I really vibe with, but I wish it wasn't just an invisible indistinct energy-creature. Literally anything else would be more interesting. I'd much rather have an awful little piece of shit critter that hangs around evil monsters and goads violence on than a... wait what I just described is a minion.

Trolls
There are four new types of trolls described here in the Fiend Folio, but most of them are uninteresting and repetitive!

It's a pretty good creepy drawing though!

Giant Troll & Giant Two-Headed Troll
★☆☆☆☆
Hybrids of trolls and other giant humanoids (hill giants in the case of the giant troll and ettins in the case of the giant two-headed troll). I get bored of mostly uninteresting humanoid hybrids. I'd much rather normal trolls just sometimes be allowed to be really big, or have two heads, than these get written up as totally separate monsters with naturalistic explanations. The two-headed troll is basically just a normal ass troll with a lower chance of surprise! Who cares!!

 Ice Troll & Spirit Troll
★★☆☆☆
These are both mildly more interesting than the other two troll variants. Ice trolls are not literally made of ice, but have the appearance of a translucent crystalline structure. It isn't mentioned here, but I'd love if you could see their internal organs, shivering and pulsating inside their icey exteriors. The ice troll is probably my favorite of the whole set here, namely because its regeneration only works when it is immersed in water. Almost like the opposite of Minecraft's enderman, goading the monster out of the water is an interesting strategy for combatting ice trolls, and presents good OSR-style problem solving on top of the already existing challenge of troll regeneration. Spirit trolls are hybrids like the giant trolls and giant two-headed troll, but they are hybrids of trolls and invisible stalkers. My distaste for humanoid hybrids loops back around to me now being morbidly fascinated at the very question of how that match even works. The magical breeding that produces spirit trolls is literally described as "perverted." Only the most nasty of wizards make spirit trolls. Spirit trolls are basically just trolls that are invisible and deal damage to STR as well as HP.

Tween
★★☆☆☆
A stupid name for a very strange monster. Tweens are entities that exist only on the ethereal plane and partner up with people on the prime material plane, forming a hazy shadowy mirror image of them that exerts a strange sort of effect on the host and those around them. Tweens can see a few seconds into the future and increase their host's luck while making everything worse for those around them. Basically, the host always has advantage on every roll, while everyone else around them, friend or foe, always has disadvantage. They didn't have that kind of language back when the Fiend Folio was published, so this whole system is explained in way too many words. I wish more was described about the relationship that the tween has with its host. It reminds me a lot of the vibe of an X-Files episode and... dammit, that makes me want to bump it up to three stars. If this was described differently, and more of an emphasis was placed on the, for lack of a better term, human element, I think I'd like it so much more. Something that just barely nudges swords out of the way and exerts an unlucky field around itself latching onto someone that it seemingly cares about, cares about enough to make lucky instead of unlucky, is such an interesting idea... I just wish it wasn't shackled to AD&D's kinda clunky implementation.

The tween was also originally featured in the Fiend Factory column! The illustration is much more unsettling than the Folio illustration, depicting a hunched-over, hazy, emaciated thing, and the description is pretty much the same in the broad strokes as the Folio version. However, the Factory version does note that the host will not be aware of the tween's presence! That explicitly cuts out the most thought provoking part of what I liked about the tween, the idea that they may be aware of something supernatural going on even if they don't necessarily understand it, and that the tween might literally care about their host. Turnbull's comment opens with a note that the tween could have easily been a character class which is actually insane. He also delights in the confusion that players might experience having to do all these extra rolls for no clear reason if one of the party members has a tween latched onto them, and provides some advice on how to handle that sort of thing.

Well anyway! Next time, we will be picking up where we are leaving off, with the letter U! I also think that it is very likely that our next installment will be our last, since there are very few monsters in those last letters of the alphabet. Looking forward to finally getting there, after much, much too long!

Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 15 (Shocker to Symbiotic Jelly)

Back at it again! Here's the last entry in this series, here's a link to the first post, etc. etc., time to pick back up where we last left off!

 

 

 

To begin with, however, I'd like to make some notes of a couple monsters that I accidentally missed had original versions in Fiend Factory! First, my overwhelming favorite from the last entry, the SHEET PHANTOM!!! You can't imagine my delight when I was scrolling through my pdf of the Factory column and saw this delightful illustration of the undead fabric that I had somehow completely missed. Content-wise, the Factory sheet phantom is just a simpler presentation of the phantom and ghoul in the Folio; I really appreciate the economy of language on display. For instance, the sheet ghoul is just one sentence rather than a whole separate entry. I could learn a thing or two from that!

On top of that (literally), it turned out that the berbalang, a Malay vampire that we covered much earlier in this series (like four years ago, embarrassingly enough), was also first present in Fiend Factory! I really like the way they rendered the name, with those cool bat wings on either side; and while the Russ Nicholson illustration in the Folio is distinctive, this one is pretty good too! The description is very similar to the Folio berbalang, so I don't really have anything to add there. Just wanted to make sure to note it!

Shocker

★★☆☆☆

Not the... worst monster I've seen, it's definitely very usable and I think there could be something interesting here, but the way its presented here leaves a Lot to be desired. Basically, its a hazy humanoid crackling with energy that has an electrical shock attack. That's about it; the only other interesting detail is that there are 1d4 gemstones within the shocker's body that will become apparent when it attacks; I quite like that, it feels kinda videogamey in a good way. Everything else is either incredibly basic and boring or just unnecessary. The entire first paragraph is a waste of ink, taking up almost half the creature's description just to say "we don't know where it comes from, maybe this plane, maybe that plane, who knows." Boring! Just commit to something interesting, please. Would be 1 star except I do think I'd use an electricity monster with gems inside, I just would want it to be more interesting than this.

 

Skeleton Warrior

★★★★☆

At first glance, this one looks really generic, typical of the overly taxonomic listings of various undead types in AD&D manuals; it's basically just a fighter class equivalent of the lich. While a fighter-lich might have some abstract value for gameplay, what I find more interesting and more compelling here is the tragic quality implicit in the skeleton warrior's description. They are "clad in the rich, but faded and rotting trappings of a powerful warrior," and are constantly in search of golden circlets which hold their soul similar to a lich's phylactery. Unlike the lich, the skeleton warrior doesn't necessarily know where this circlet is, and if one puts the circlet on their head and is within 240 feet of the skeleton warrior, they control the skeleton warrior's movements and actions. If the skeleton warrior is more than 240 feet away, or one takes off the circlet, the control goes away; and if the circlet is still in the possession of the skeleton warrior's former controller, they will rush at their former controller and attempt to kill them and take the circlet for themselves; for when they put the golden circlet on their head, they immediately die, and the circlet collapses into worthless dust. It also mentions that skeleton warriors will become aware of you the moment you acquire one such golden circlet even if you don't know how it works and seek you out too. This is amazing stuff! The implicit narrative here, of a long dead once-great warrior forced to cling to a pitiful existence while constantly at risk of being turned into little more than a puppet, violently seeking out his own destruction by seizing the golden circlet from its current owner at the first chance he gets, is incredibly compelling! I think that element alone makes me interested in putting a skeleton warrior in my game, although I'd probably make it somewhat unique rather than a whole "type" of undead; and maybe he will plead for the adventurers' mercy, begging to be allowed to collapse into dust, while being controlled by one of the players. 

Skulk

★★★☆☆

Just neat! Apparently, a people group known for cowardice can eventually evolve to develop chameleon-like camouflage powers (only a 10% chance of sighting one when they're not moving!). Who knew! They sneak and skulk (hehehe) around, stealing stuff to survive, using their heightened camouflage to blend into their surroundings. The note that these were once normal human beings who evolved chameleon-like powers makes them much more interesting than if they were just another demihuman race. The description is overwrought but that's to be expected I guess.

 

The five types of slaadi: clockwise from top left, Blue, Green, Red, Grey, and Death Slaadi

SLAAD

★★★★☆

The slaadi might be one of the best, most enduring, most distinctive and fun of the "races" of entities created for the Fiend Folio. I can't help but love an army of extradimensional color-coded frog-men, drawn in Russ Nicholson's delightfully grotty style each sporting somewhere between a shit-eating grin and a toothy grimace. While they dwell in the outer plane of Limbo along with the githzerai (who I explored the implications of in this previous installment), they can also be found "roaming the Prime Material Plane on missions of woe." MISSIONS OF WOE!!!! I love missions of woe!!

 

Even though there are five different types of slaadi, I'm bundling them all together because they're all basically the same. This is where I struggle; while I like the kind of videogamey color-coding of the ranks of malignant slaad, they take up just about two full pages of text to basically just say that this slaad has access to this spell list while this other kind has a this other spell list. It's incredibly unnecessary, and I think could be done in a much more succinct way. All slaadi have a gemstone-like symbol embedded in their skull which, when possessed, allows the holder to give the slaad three commands (although they must be rightfully rewarded for performing the commanded actions or else they'll kill you!). In addition, blue slaadi have sharp blades embedded in the backs of their hands that give them extra attacks, death slaadi are extra powerful (only four are known to exist), green slaadi reincarnate as blue slaadi if their bodies are destroyed but their symbol isn't (weird?), grey slaadi are the Executioners sent to the material plane to do the bidding of slaad leaders, and red slaadi have toxic pellets they inject when they attack that kill the target in 3-36 hours (weird range) on a failed save. Some of these are more distinctive than others; I'm docking one point mostly for the kinda annoying over-taxonomization of it all, but in general, as a concept I love the slaad... and that concept is only strengthened by the entities that lead this merry band of atrocious amphibians.

 

WOE BETIDE BEFORE SSENDAM

Ssendam - Lord of the Insane

★★★★★

The first of the two slaad lords is SSENDAM, a shapeshifter (the more powerful slaadi have the ability to shapeshift between their frog-like form and a human form) that appears either as a human with an accursed black sword or as a golden amoeba with a human brain instead of a nucleus. DUDE!!! That's SICK!!! In actuality, Ssendam's original form is just a golden frog-slaad unconscious in the plane of Limbo while his amoeboid form is in the Prime Material Plane, which I think is much more boring than if he was just a brain-amoeba all the time, but I gotta hand it to them for the amazing image of a shimmering slimy amoeba with a human brain floating at its center commanding an army of devil-frogs. I just love it!! He attacks with corrosive pseudopods, casts a lot of powerful spells, can summon any of the five types of slaadi, and regenerates 3 hp per round in combat, so he's a hefty opponent! Also: "When encountered, Ssendam always gives his true name, though woe betide he who tries to use it." I don't often get to the level of play where my players would be facing off against a creature as powerful as Ssendam, but in terms of high level monsters, this is a great one; I think I'd just make it so he's always in amoeba form (ooh or maybe he can shape his amoeba body into a vaguely humanoid silhouette rather than being able to shapeshift perfectly into a human).

 

COWER BEFORE "DEATH" IN THE CLAWS OF YGORL

Ygorl - Lord of Entropy

★★★★★

It's ya gorl! Just like with Ssendam, Ygorl is a slaad lord with a delightfully incongruent design: a pitch black, skeletal, bat-winged figure wielding a large scythe on the side of which is inscribed the word "DEATH", riding on an ancient brass dragon which the description informs us is named Shkiv. Ygorl doesn't change his form, unlike Ssendam, and nobody has seen his original frog-like form in Limbo (though the description includes speculation that it is a large black-colored slaad; again, I'd much rather Ygorl just always be the dark skeletal figure atop the dragon). Ygorl's death-scythe kills instantly on a failed save, and he attacks with it twice per round (in addition to Shkiv's presumed dragon-breath), as well as having a whole litany of spells and once-per-day powers (including power word: kill; maybe a bit overboard when your scythe already does basically the same thing!). Facing off against either Ssendam or Ygorl would be incredibly difficult, with all the various powers afforded them and their ability to summon other slaadi. I'd like to think that Ssendam and Ygorl are rivals; perhaps their interminable conflict (and whatever annoyance comes from the clone-like githzerai) is the only thing stopping the slaadi from completely overrunning the world; getting caught up in a space-faring extradimensional demon-frog cold war (with the gith as a wild card element) would make for an interesting higher level game!

Snyad (aka Pestie)

★☆☆☆☆

Mischievous and violent small humanoid #1589459. The description even notes that they're a cousin of the mite, which makes it even more obvious just how similar the two are! Not even the two grotty Russ Nicholson drawings featured alongside it can save this one. They dwell in tunnels dug into the sides of corridors that are really well hidden and only emerge to steal from adventuring parties, and never attack; they sometimes work with mites to lay traps, and have no spoken language yet somehow work together. Please just use a goblin.

 

Son of Kyuss

★★★★★

YEAHHH!!! The Son of Kyuss always stuck out to me, like some of the really iconic and distinctly "fiend folio" monsters from toward the beginning of the book. A staggering, shuddering walking corpse, animated by some evil priest long ago whose name still clings to them, with great big green worms writhing around in their eye sockets, nose hole, and mouth. It's an incredibly striking visual!! Just the simple addition of the worms takes this from Yet Another Undead to a unique type of undead that has its own distinctive associations. Mechanically, they're relatively simple yet distinct; they attack primarily by just flailing around their rotten fists which is so unsettling and gross, feeling less like an actual calculated attack and more like them just forcing their dead bulk on you, and there's a chance that the worms in their face-holes can jump out at a target and burrow into their flesh, beelining for the brain in 1d4 rounds. The worms end up feeling like they have more agency than the corpses themselves! On top of that, the Son of Kyuss's unfeeling fists cause LEPROSY. What's not to love! I think that the Sons of Kyuss would fit perfectly in the world of King of Kings, alongside my leprosy-causing assassin-geckos and parrot-fiends.

 

 

Hobbitses (aka silly little guys) are constantly in danger of being in the dungeon

Stunjelly

★★★☆☆

A relative of the gelatinous cube that trades the cube's transparent hallway-filling slime for a translucent surface that visually imitates the look of a stone wall. A lesser-known entrant into the "every single surface and object in the dungeon can and will kill you" genre! I personally find this less fun and evocative than the kinda weirder lurker above or trapper, but I guess it fills the space between those two! Paralyzes targets with a touch before trying to engulf and digest them. It's okay! 

 

Sussurus

★★★★★

The sussurus (taking its name from susurration, a term for a murmuring, whispering sound) is another Fiend Folio classic, a weird headless ape-thing made out of knotted thorny matter (it looks like a plant but the description doesn't say it is), criss-crossed with hollow tunnels that produce a droning sound when air moves through them. The sussurus "sees" through vibrations, feeds on the air, and is rendered briefly immobile by strong enough wind surging through its passageways. The "drone song" of the sussurus causes undead creatures to become placid, to enter a "sleep of the dead" where they stand there listlessly, only breaking out of it when attacked. Additionally, it hates fire; not because it is susceptible to burning, but because fire burns away oxygen! I just love how weird all of the various elements of the sussurus are, yet they feel just right all together, and mysterious enough to prompt interesting questions from the hypothetical players: where did these things come from, and why does the droning sound of their breathing cause undead to fall into a peaceful standing-sleep? I'd also recommend checking out this really great article over at Bogleech.com all about the various forms the sussurus has taken across the different editions of D&D!

 

Svirfneblin (aka Deep Gnome)

★★☆☆☆

Please Gary... no more demihuman races... there's too many of them... Svirfneblin first appear in the original series of adventure modules that first introduced the Underdark, the same origin point as the Drow and Kuo-Toa. Perhaps this is just due to my inclination toward weird evil things but the Svirfneblin feel like the weakest of the new subterranean races introduced in that line of modules. And yet, the Folio takes almost a page and a half to describe Deep Gnome powers and abilities, the weapons they carry, the makeup of their parties, etc. etc. It's a lot like the overwrought description for the Kuo-Toa honestly. Notably, they can summon earth elementals, and when the going gets tough they flee into tunnels carved exactly to their size (so I guess the players wouldn't be able to follow after... unless they were halflings or gnomes themselves?), and they'll only assist the players for a fee. The Russ Nicholson illustration does have a Jim Henson's Labyrinth quality to it which I like, but Svirfneblin are kinda meh... kinda like the name though! I think I'd just prefer something more like folkloric kobolds than yet-another-gnome-variant.

 

Symbiotic Jelly

★☆☆☆☆

Ahh... the furtive symbiotic jelly, so easily forgotten... and for good reason! I love weird slimes and oozes, I love monsters with very particular niches and lifestyles, but there is just Too Much going on with this monster in terms of what it does. The description itself isn't particularly long, but it proscribes such a particular mode of behavior for the jelly that I can't imagine ever actually putting it into a game. In basic terms, the symbiotic jelly has to feed on a carnivorous creature at the same time as the carnivore is feeding; weird, but alright. What it does to ensure this happens is, it hangs around in a monster's lair, and when the monster returns, it charms the creature and makes it attack whatever enters the lair afterward, and then uses a magical illusion power to make the carnivorous monster look weaker than it really is, and make the lair look like its filled with treasure when it isn't. I guess, to trick players into going into the lair because it'll seem like treasure that they can easily grab without having to worry about the monster. What is even the point of this. Moreso than the stunjelly or the lurker above or whatever, this monster seems like it only exists to fuck with the players. 

 

...strangely enough though, this player-fucking-with monster is actually our only creature in this post (not counting the ones I missed previously at the top) that has an original from the Fiend Factory; and the original name is So much better.

The CHAOTICUS SYMBIOTICUS??? I kinda really love the illustration here actually; the description is, as expected, much simpler, but basically hits the same notes as the Folio description. Don Turnbull loved this thing apparently:

Cheerio Fred! Perhaps his suggestion of only one per dungeon is a good one; I for one would only want one of these per campaign, if at all!

Now that was way more monsters than I originally planned on covering, but I didn't want to cut S into even smaller chunks. Sorry about that! I hope it's still interesting and fun to read :) Stay tuned next time for even more weirdos, starting with the letter T!

Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 14 (Retriever to Sheet Phantom)

Alright, back to reviewing every monster in the Fiend Folio, a classic series on this blog that... jeeze louise, the last time I posted one of these was more than a year ago! Uh, my bad. I already talked about why I wasn't so active on the blog in a post back in May, but like, all that goes double for just never getting around to reviewing the FF again. Anyway, here's the first installment in the Goin' Through the Fiend Folio series, here's the last installment, etc etc, let's pick up where we left off!

Retriever

★★★☆☆

Nasty, bloody, and real effective, the retriever is a certified Fiend Folio classic! Six-eyed (with four different eye-rays that cast fire, cold, lightning, and a transmutation spell!) and four-bladed spider-things, constructed by the demon-lord Demogorgon, built in such a way that they "strike maximum terror into their victims." In this description, Demogorgon comes out sounding like a mad scientist of some sort, like a Dr. Frankenstein or a Yakub, except instead of making the white devil race, he made a bunch of evil robot spiders. Or, well, me calling them robots is maybe projecting back onto them somewhat. You see, I was first introduced to the retriever in the 4e Monster Manual 2, the very first D&D book I ever owned, before I even knew what D&D really was! I think I've mentioned this on the blog before, albeit briefly; I basically treated it as a bestiary that communicated an implied setting all its own, with no connection to anything else. And I loved the retriever in the MM2. 

 

You won't hear me say this often, but I actually prefer the version of the monster in 4e than I do here in the AD&D Fiend Folio. This is doubly shocking to me because the FF retriever has art by my favorite Russ Nicholson, with his grotty style bringing a slimy hairy vibe to the original retriever's illustration. And I love grotty, slimy, hairy beasties; but the sleek, explicitly robotic design on the 4e retriever stands out so starkly against monster other demonic entities, giving it a quality almost similar to the smooth slicked-back look of Giger's xenomorph design. Mechanically, the two aren't actually that different; both have four eye rays (though the 4e retriever has each ray pairing a damage type and a lasting effect, so an acid spray that also blinds the target, a thunder-ray (whatever that is) that stuns the target, etc.), both have bladed claws they make melee attacks with, etc.; the major differences are that the AD&D retriever has a fear effect that causes all characters of level 5 or less, or all monsters of HD 6 or less, to save or flee, and that the 4e retriever has a self-healing ability, a "retrieve" ability that grabs a target on a failed save, and "Unerring Accuracy," which allows it to TELEPORT to the approximate location of a given target. That is so cool, and means that the retriever actually, y'know, retrieves; it is a creation given a particular target to teleport to, grab, and then disappear (tho there's a "cooldown" on its unerring accuracy ability). I don't like 4e mechanically, but this retriever that actually retrieves is a much more compelling creature than Dr. Demogorgon's fucked up and evil spider (as much as I love Dr. Demogorgon's creation; one of the more boring elements of the 4e retriever is that it isn't related to any particular demon, but just to "the primordials" in general).

 

 

The 4e MM2 retriever

The revenant in COMBAT

Revenant

★★☆☆☆

This creature has pretty much the same problem as the penanngalan from our last entry: a way too long description that prescribes one particular narrative arc of dealing with it. The revenant (another example of AD&D statting up every single synonym for an undead monster as its own separate entity) takes up a full page and some change to more or less just describe an animated corpse motivated by vengeance against whoever killed it, ceaselessly seeking out its murderer and their associates; on top of that, it cannot be killed by any means except fire, and its limbs will continue to attack even after being severed, and will reattach themselves if they are able to. There you go! Doesn't need a full page of description! But, of course, they have to go into what specific ability scores someone must have to become a revenant when killed, the fact that its immune to turn undead (for the reason that it isn't evil but instead is neutral? Didn't know a cleric's turn undead only works against evil undead, apparently), the fact that it will only attack by strangulation not with weapons, its immunities, eye-based fear ability, when it will hunt down the killer's associates, and how it doesn't even have to be the body of the person killed (very weird and arbitrary decision). This is pretty clearly intended to be a punishment for murder-happy players, unceasingly hunting down the party but with abilities that counteract most strategies players would use to combat the undead. A murder victim hunting down their killer from beyond the grave is incredibly compelling, but the execution here is clunky and overwrought. Love the two Russ Nicholson illustrations they gave it though.

Rothé

★★☆☆☆

Shaggy-furred bovines that live underground. That's about it. They're smaller (only 4 feet tall), presumably as an adaptation for their subterranean environs, but other than that they are little more than cows or yaks. I like the image of underground bovines, but I think I would rather just use normal cows or some kind of explicitly troglobitic cow, rather than this bespoke fictional species. Just kinda meh. 

 

Sandman
★★★☆☆
"The sandman's name describes it exactly"-- I have to appreciate a monster description that opens with that! Mysterious humanoids made from sand that make all who come within 20 feet (or who touch them) very very sleepy. They aren't hostile, only acting to forcibly remove someone asleep under their power if they happen to be in the sandman's lair. Simple but effective! I think I would want one more incongruous weird element to add some depth; as it is right now, the sandman is little more than a word-association game between the fairy tale sandman and literal sand. 

The sandman is our first Fiend Factory creature in this post! The original Factory sandman is more or less the same, just left a bit vaguer in terms of mechanics; though it is also noted that the sandman will attack players at least until they fall asleep, whereas the Folio description doesn't mention attacks on players (though perhaps its assumed). Don Turnbull, in his note on the monster, remarks that the sleep effect means defenseless players left open to wandering monster checks! That's such a good thing to point out; a generally non-hostile creature that incapacitates the players and leaves them open to wandering monsters is always a good thing to have in the dungeon. He also asks why the AC is so high, and y'know thats a good question, I hadn't noticed that: both the Factory and Folio versions of the sandman have AC 3, one point less than plate and shield. Also, the illustration is different, the Factory sandman being much more indistinct, leaning over into a crumbling limp, with "hair" caught in the wind, while the Folio sandman is just a frowning dude done in a stippled style.

Scarecrow
★★★☆☆
It's a scarecrow! The opening line to the sandman's description could work just as well here. Everybody loves a good spooky scarecrow. These are magical constructs that "always... appear evil and of malign intent," and they have turnips and (based on the illustration) gourds for heads. The one weird thing is that the scarecrow has a charm effect that causes the viewer to be stand shock still, as if under the effect of a hold person spell, out of "fascination." Don't know how I feel about that effect, its pretty basic and incongruous but not really in an interesting way. Nothing much else to say, although gotta shout out another great Russ Nicholson illustration!

Screaming Devilkin
★★★☆☆
Despite appearances, not actually a demon or devil, but simply a mundane creature that looks like one. The description specifically compares screaming devilkin to mephits, although its illustration is much more like a chubby little devil baby than the more gremlinesque mephits. Always hostile, always attacks (boring!!), although it attacks with a barbed tail which is always fun. More notably, the screaming devilkin, well, screams! It will constantly scream in the presence of other living creatures, and its screaming is so loud that conversations can't be heard through it and all those in the range of the screaming have to make a save to even just attack or cast a spell. Not the worst power to have, although it's more or less the same thing that the classic Monster Manual monster the shrieker has; I definitely prefer weird screaming mushrooms to weird screaming devil babies.

Shadow Demon
★☆☆☆☆
Incredibly boring. Maybe doesn't quite deserve a 1 star, because it is honestly usable mechanics-wise, but conceptually and mechanically its just boring. "The essence of a demon imprisoned in the form of a shadow," whatever that means; ultimately, it just means that its a souped up alternative to the shadow from the Monster Manual, with a more typical sorta-edgy demon silhouette complete with bat wings and an evil glare. It is more powerful in darkness and weaker in light (yawn! who could've seen that coming!), can cast the darkness spell, has a strong jump because of its wings but can't fly, etc. And it takes up half a page of description to basically say everything that someone would just guess from "shadow but with more magic powers." Very low conceptual density!

Sheet Phantom and Sheet Ghoul
★★★★★
YEAH I'M GIVING THE SHEET PHANTOM FIVE STARS SO WHAT!!! This is one of those classic Fiend Folio monsters that everyone loves to crack jokes about and say is stupid, but that's because everyone hates IMAGINATION and the horror that can come from something incongruous or somewhat goofy. These two monsters are actually listed in reverse order from how I have them here, just due to the alphabetical order, but the sheet phantom is the more important of the two. Sheet phantoms are wraithlike undead that appear as rectangular pieces of cloth (translucent and ghostly? The exact appearance of the rectangle is unclear in the text, just the measurement) and crawl up onto ceilings to drop down on their victims, suffocating them until they perish and rise anew as a sheet ghoul. The description for the sheet ghoul doesn't mention that the sheet phantom hangs on the ghoul, but many later illustrations (see below) depict it that way. Sheet ghouls don't have the paralysis powers of the ghoul, but in exchange they can shoot acid from their nostrils!!!! I love that so much!! Why does the wraithlike sheet phantom cause its undead thralls to snort acid? It feels so gnarly, and like maybe it would slowly corrode and destroy the sheet ghoul as it uses the attack; maybe a sheet ghoul under a sheet phantom's thrall for long enough has a dripping, melting hole in the center of its face where its nose once was, corroded away by its acidic snot. The imagery of the sheet phantom's suffocating attack is also delightfully horrid; I can't help but love the pathetic horror of someone flailing on the ground as they are choked to death by a piece of cloth. I love every single thing about the sheet phantom, this is a sleeper hit!!! The description does note how similar the sheet phantom is to some of AD&D's similar drop-attacking monsters, namely the Lurker Above, a similarly maligned creature from the Monster Manual that I just love (and recently mentioned in the description for my Man-Mimic Lizard!); it even notes the possibility that the sheet phantom is in fact an undead Lurker Above, which is pretty thought-provoking (although I don't know how much it adds to the funny creepiness of the sheet phantom itself).

Here's the illustration from the 2e Monstrous Manual Compendium Fiend Folio; I think the sheet phantom ought to be bigger than that, but I love the image of it hanging on the sheet ghoul's head like that.

That's all for now! The letter S also just so happens to be one of the most monsterful letters in the Folio, so we will be picking up where we left off next time, with the Shocker and, more notably, all the types of Slaad! Stay tuned!