Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 15 (Shocker to Symbiotic Jelly)

Back at it again! Here's the last entry in this series, here's a link to the first post, etc. etc., time to pick back up where we last left off!

 

 

 

To begin with, however, I'd like to make some notes of a couple monsters that I accidentally missed had original versions in Fiend Factory! First, my overwhelming favorite from the last entry, the SHEET PHANTOM!!! You can't imagine my delight when I was scrolling through my pdf of the Factory column and saw this delightful illustration of the undead fabric that I had somehow completely missed. Content-wise, the Factory sheet phantom is just a simpler presentation of the phantom and ghoul in the Folio; I really appreciate the economy of language on display. For instance, the sheet ghoul is just one sentence rather than a whole separate entry. I could learn a thing or two from that!

On top of that (literally), it turned out that the berbalang, a Malay vampire that we covered much earlier in this series (like four years ago, embarrassingly enough), was also first present in Fiend Factory! I really like the way they rendered the name, with those cool bat wings on either side; and while the Russ Nicholson illustration in the Folio is distinctive, this one is pretty good too! The description is very similar to the Folio berbalang, so I don't really have anything to add there. Just wanted to make sure to note it!

Shocker

★★☆☆☆

Not the... worst monster I've seen, it's definitely very usable and I think there could be something interesting here, but the way its presented here leaves a Lot to be desired. Basically, its a hazy humanoid crackling with energy that has an electrical shock attack. That's about it; the only other interesting detail is that there are 1d4 gemstones within the shocker's body that will become apparent when it attacks; I quite like that, it feels kinda videogamey in a good way. Everything else is either incredibly basic and boring or just unnecessary. The entire first paragraph is a waste of ink, taking up almost half the creature's description just to say "we don't know where it comes from, maybe this plane, maybe that plane, who knows." Boring! Just commit to something interesting, please. Would be 1 star except I do think I'd use an electricity monster with gems inside, I just would want it to be more interesting than this.

 

Skeleton Warrior

★★★★☆

At first glance, this one looks really generic, typical of the overly taxonomic listings of various undead types in AD&D manuals; it's basically just a fighter class equivalent of the lich. While a fighter-lich might have some abstract value for gameplay, what I find more interesting and more compelling here is the tragic quality implicit in the skeleton warrior's description. They are "clad in the rich, but faded and rotting trappings of a powerful warrior," and are constantly in search of golden circlets which hold their soul similar to a lich's phylactery. Unlike the lich, the skeleton warrior doesn't necessarily know where this circlet is, and if one puts the circlet on their head and is within 240 feet of the skeleton warrior, they control the skeleton warrior's movements and actions. If the skeleton warrior is more than 240 feet away, or one takes off the circlet, the control goes away; and if the circlet is still in the possession of the skeleton warrior's former controller, they will rush at their former controller and attempt to kill them and take the circlet for themselves; for when they put the golden circlet on their head, they immediately die, and the circlet collapses into worthless dust. It also mentions that skeleton warriors will become aware of you the moment you acquire one such golden circlet even if you don't know how it works and seek you out too. This is amazing stuff! The implicit narrative here, of a long dead once-great warrior forced to cling to a pitiful existence while constantly at risk of being turned into little more than a puppet, violently seeking out his own destruction by seizing the golden circlet from its current owner at the first chance he gets, is incredibly compelling! I think that element alone makes me interested in putting a skeleton warrior in my game, although I'd probably make it somewhat unique rather than a whole "type" of undead; and maybe he will plead for the adventurers' mercy, begging to be allowed to collapse into dust, while being controlled by one of the players. 

Skulk

★★★☆☆

Just neat! Apparently, a people group known for cowardice can eventually evolve to develop chameleon-like camouflage powers (only a 10% chance of sighting one when they're not moving!). Who knew! They sneak and skulk (hehehe) around, stealing stuff to survive, using their heightened camouflage to blend into their surroundings. The note that these were once normal human beings who evolved chameleon-like powers makes them much more interesting than if they were just another demihuman race. The description is overwrought but that's to be expected I guess.

 

The five types of slaadi: clockwise from top left, Blue, Green, Red, Grey, and Death Slaadi

SLAAD

★★★★☆

The slaadi might be one of the best, most enduring, most distinctive and fun of the "races" of entities created for the Fiend Folio. I can't help but love an army of extradimensional color-coded frog-men, drawn in Russ Nicholson's delightfully grotty style each sporting somewhere between a shit-eating grin and a toothy grimace. While they dwell in the outer plane of Limbo along with the githzerai (who I explored the implications of in this previous installment), they can also be found "roaming the Prime Material Plane on missions of woe." MISSIONS OF WOE!!!! I love missions of woe!!

 

Even though there are five different types of slaadi, I'm bundling them all together because they're all basically the same. This is where I struggle; while I like the kind of videogamey color-coding of the ranks of malignant slaad, they take up just about two full pages of text to basically just say that this slaad has access to this spell list while this other kind has a this other spell list. It's incredibly unnecessary, and I think could be done in a much more succinct way. All slaadi have a gemstone-like symbol embedded in their skull which, when possessed, allows the holder to give the slaad three commands (although they must be rightfully rewarded for performing the commanded actions or else they'll kill you!). In addition, blue slaadi have sharp blades embedded in the backs of their hands that give them extra attacks, death slaadi are extra powerful (only four are known to exist), green slaadi reincarnate as blue slaadi if their bodies are destroyed but their symbol isn't (weird?), grey slaadi are the Executioners sent to the material plane to do the bidding of slaad leaders, and red slaadi have toxic pellets they inject when they attack that kill the target in 3-36 hours (weird range) on a failed save. Some of these are more distinctive than others; I'm docking one point mostly for the kinda annoying over-taxonomization of it all, but in general, as a concept I love the slaad... and that concept is only strengthened by the entities that lead this merry band of atrocious amphibians.

 

WOE BETIDE BEFORE SSENDAM

Ssendam - Lord of the Insane

★★★★★

The first of the two slaad lords is SSENDAM, a shapeshifter (the more powerful slaadi have the ability to shapeshift between their frog-like form and a human form) that appears either as a human with an accursed black sword or as a golden amoeba with a human brain instead of a nucleus. DUDE!!! That's SICK!!! In actuality, Ssendam's original form is just a golden frog-slaad unconscious in the plane of Limbo while his amoeboid form is in the Prime Material Plane, which I think is much more boring than if he was just a brain-amoeba all the time, but I gotta hand it to them for the amazing image of a shimmering slimy amoeba with a human brain floating at its center commanding an army of devil-frogs. I just love it!! He attacks with corrosive pseudopods, casts a lot of powerful spells, can summon any of the five types of slaadi, and regenerates 3 hp per round in combat, so he's a hefty opponent! Also: "When encountered, Ssendam always gives his true name, though woe betide he who tries to use it." I don't often get to the level of play where my players would be facing off against a creature as powerful as Ssendam, but in terms of high level monsters, this is a great one; I think I'd just make it so he's always in amoeba form (ooh or maybe he can shape his amoeba body into a vaguely humanoid silhouette rather than being able to shapeshift perfectly into a human).

 

COWER BEFORE "DEATH" IN THE CLAWS OF YGORL

Ygorl - Lord of Entropy

★★★★★

It's ya gorl! Just like with Ssendam, Ygorl is a slaad lord with a delightfully incongruent design: a pitch black, skeletal, bat-winged figure wielding a large scythe on the side of which is inscribed the word "DEATH", riding on an ancient brass dragon which the description informs us is named Shkiv. Ygorl doesn't change his form, unlike Ssendam, and nobody has seen his original frog-like form in Limbo (though the description includes speculation that it is a large black-colored slaad; again, I'd much rather Ygorl just always be the dark skeletal figure atop the dragon). Ygorl's death-scythe kills instantly on a failed save, and he attacks with it twice per round (in addition to Shkiv's presumed dragon-breath), as well as having a whole litany of spells and once-per-day powers (including power word: kill; maybe a bit overboard when your scythe already does basically the same thing!). Facing off against either Ssendam or Ygorl would be incredibly difficult, with all the various powers afforded them and their ability to summon other slaadi. I'd like to think that Ssendam and Ygorl are rivals; perhaps their interminable conflict (and whatever annoyance comes from the clone-like githzerai) is the only thing stopping the slaadi from completely overrunning the world; getting caught up in a space-faring extradimensional demon-frog cold war (with the gith as a wild card element) would make for an interesting higher level game!

Snyad (aka Pestie)

★☆☆☆☆

Mischievous and violent small humanoid #1589459. The description even notes that they're a cousin of the mite, which makes it even more obvious just how similar the two are! Not even the two grotty Russ Nicholson drawings featured alongside it can save this one. They dwell in tunnels dug into the sides of corridors that are really well hidden and only emerge to steal from adventuring parties, and never attack; they sometimes work with mites to lay traps, and have no spoken language yet somehow work together. Please just use a goblin.

 

Son of Kyuss

★★★★★

YEAHHH!!! The Son of Kyuss always stuck out to me, like some of the really iconic and distinctly "fiend folio" monsters from toward the beginning of the book. A staggering, shuddering walking corpse, animated by some evil priest long ago whose name still clings to them, with great big green worms writhing around in their eye sockets, nose hole, and mouth. It's an incredibly striking visual!! Just the simple addition of the worms takes this from Yet Another Undead to a unique type of undead that has its own distinctive associations. Mechanically, they're relatively simple yet distinct; they attack primarily by just flailing around their rotten fists which is so unsettling and gross, feeling less like an actual calculated attack and more like them just forcing their dead bulk on you, and there's a chance that the worms in their face-holes can jump out at a target and burrow into their flesh, beelining for the brain in 1d4 rounds. The worms end up feeling like they have more agency than the corpses themselves! On top of that, the Son of Kyuss's unfeeling fists cause LEPROSY. What's not to love! I think that the Sons of Kyuss would fit perfectly in the world of King of Kings, alongside my leprosy-causing assassin-geckos and parrot-fiends.

 

 

Hobbitses (aka silly little guys) are constantly in danger of being in the dungeon

Stunjelly

★★★☆☆

A relative of the gelatinous cube that trades the cube's transparent hallway-filling slime for a translucent surface that visually imitates the look of a stone wall. A lesser-known entrant into the "every single surface and object in the dungeon can and will kill you" genre! I personally find this less fun and evocative than the kinda weirder lurker above or trapper, but I guess it fills the space between those two! Paralyzes targets with a touch before trying to engulf and digest them. It's okay! 

 

Sussurus

★★★★★

The sussurus (taking its name from susurration, a term for a murmuring, whispering sound) is another Fiend Folio classic, a weird headless ape-thing made out of knotted thorny matter (it looks like a plant but the description doesn't say it is), criss-crossed with hollow tunnels that produce a droning sound when air moves through them. The sussurus "sees" through vibrations, feeds on the air, and is rendered briefly immobile by strong enough wind surging through its passageways. The "drone song" of the sussurus causes undead creatures to become placid, to enter a "sleep of the dead" where they stand there listlessly, only breaking out of it when attacked. Additionally, it hates fire; not because it is susceptible to burning, but because fire burns away oxygen! I just love how weird all of the various elements of the sussurus are, yet they feel just right all together, and mysterious enough to prompt interesting questions from the hypothetical players: where did these things come from, and why does the droning sound of their breathing cause undead to fall into a peaceful standing-sleep? I'd also recommend checking out this really great article over at Bogleech.com all about the various forms the sussurus has taken across the different editions of D&D!

 

Svirfneblin (aka Deep Gnome)

★★☆☆☆

Please Gary... no more demihuman races... there's too many of them... Svirfneblin first appear in the original series of adventure modules that first introduced the Underdark, the same origin point as the Drow and Kuo-Toa. Perhaps this is just due to my inclination toward weird evil things but the Svirfneblin feel like the weakest of the new subterranean races introduced in that line of modules. And yet, the Folio takes almost a page and a half to describe Deep Gnome powers and abilities, the weapons they carry, the makeup of their parties, etc. etc. It's a lot like the overwrought description for the Kuo-Toa honestly. Notably, they can summon earth elementals, and when the going gets tough they flee into tunnels carved exactly to their size (so I guess the players wouldn't be able to follow after... unless they were halflings or gnomes themselves?), and they'll only assist the players for a fee. The Russ Nicholson illustration does have a Jim Henson's Labyrinth quality to it which I like, but Svirfneblin are kinda meh... kinda like the name though! I think I'd just prefer something more like folkloric kobolds than yet-another-gnome-variant.

 

Symbiotic Jelly

★☆☆☆☆

Ahh... the furtive symbiotic jelly, so easily forgotten... and for good reason! I love weird slimes and oozes, I love monsters with very particular niches and lifestyles, but there is just Too Much going on with this monster in terms of what it does. The description itself isn't particularly long, but it proscribes such a particular mode of behavior for the jelly that I can't imagine ever actually putting it into a game. In basic terms, the symbiotic jelly has to feed on a carnivorous creature at the same time as the carnivore is feeding; weird, but alright. What it does to ensure this happens is, it hangs around in a monster's lair, and when the monster returns, it charms the creature and makes it attack whatever enters the lair afterward, and then uses a magical illusion power to make the carnivorous monster look weaker than it really is, and make the lair look like its filled with treasure when it isn't. I guess, to trick players into going into the lair because it'll seem like treasure that they can easily grab without having to worry about the monster. What is even the point of this. Moreso than the stunjelly or the lurker above or whatever, this monster seems like it only exists to fuck with the players. 

 

...strangely enough though, this player-fucking-with monster is actually our only creature in this post (not counting the ones I missed previously at the top) that has an original from the Fiend Factory; and the original name is So much better.

The CHAOTICUS SYMBIOTICUS??? I kinda really love the illustration here actually; the description is, as expected, much simpler, but basically hits the same notes as the Folio description. Don Turnbull loved this thing apparently:

Cheerio Fred! Perhaps his suggestion of only one per dungeon is a good one; I for one would only want one of these per campaign, if at all!

Now that was way more monsters than I originally planned on covering, but I didn't want to cut S into even smaller chunks. Sorry about that! I hope it's still interesting and fun to read :) Stay tuned next time for even more weirdos, starting with the letter T!

The World of King of Kings: The Kingdom of the Straits

Just like with my last post, it has also been more than a year since my last King of Kings worldbuilding post! I won't bore y'all with a rehashing of my intentions for the series; this is the second part in a hopefully multi-part series of posts about various parts of the world of King of Kings, told primarily through rumors, character backgrounds, random encounters, and the like. Check out the previous World of King of Kings post for a rundown on the general historical timeline of the setting and stuff about the Enlightened Empire, the core setting of the campaign!

 

From the Church of Abreha wa Atsbeha, near Wukro, East Tigray, Ethiopia

A map of the Kingdom of the Straits, with south on top.

THE KINGDOM OF THE STRAITS

Situated to the southwest of the Enlightened Empire is the commercially powerful Kingdom of the Straits, so called because it stands astride three points which control the flow of east-west trade. The Kingdom's capital, She-ako, abides among looming obelisks in the heat of the southern continent, although its influence reaches much farther. The wise and magnanimous kings of She-ako are rich off of trade, and patronize the only bank which loans to Shahanistanis, Gnostic Elves, and Dog-Headed Men alike. It was this grand bank that, along with the kingdom's fleet of Frogling-operated sea vessels, bailed out the Enlightened Empire during the Fifty Years' Crisis (when amazons, dog-headed men, and rebels almost tore the Empire apart).

Due to its geography, the Kingdom of the Straits can be neatly divided into three parts. The Kingdom's mainland stretches from windy highlands (the old heartland, where the capital is located) down to the sweltering lowlands, where the Kingdom's two main rivers empty into the sea. Across from the mainland is the arid peninsular province, rich in frankincense, myrrh, and cinnamon. This was its own independent kingdom centuries ago, before one of the kings of She-ako invaded and razed its capital, Hudh, to the ground. The last of the Kingdom's territories is the small settlement of Kago on the heavily forested Isle of the Moon, little more than a trading outpost for tropical fruits and pygmy elephants.

 

Aksumite governor and Arabian troops, Angus McBride

RUMORS ABOUT THE STRAITS

Roll 1d12:

1: In the markets of New Hudh and elsewhere, a message is preached aloud and whispered at night: the last of Hudh's ancient kings still lives, and his return will usher in a millennium of independence for the peninsula. 

2: Beyond the southern mountain passes dwells the man-eating, four-eyed, ax-headed ogre Bulgu. The country is defended from him by a great warrior that wields stelae as if they were clubs.

3: A frogling sorcerer from She-ako has cast a spell on select coins from the grand bank that lets him see through the drachmae as if they were eyes. Only small signs, the barest of distinct notches, will show which coins are ensorcelled.

4: In the highlands around She-ako, every blacksmith in every town can transform into a hyena simply by biting his metalworking tongs.

5:  There is a frogling sailor who moors in the port of Kago with a ship made of banana peels, propelled by fruit flies. To some he is kindly despite his gross exterior, to others he is a rapacious pirate.

6: Dwelling in the mountainous highlands are emaciated ants with the faces of lions.

7: The southern amazons are engaged in a jungle war with the merchant princes in Kago. They burst out of tunnels dug beneath the undergrowth.

8: The elephants from the Kingdom of the Straits are the wisest of elephants, baptizing themselves in rivers and performing funerals for their dead. However, they are cursed, because they worship the moon.

9: Ostrich-hunters will trick these anxious birds by bending over and holding up an arm in imitation of the ostrich's silhouette, holding their spear between their toes until it is time to strike.

10: The bank of She-ako puts out bounties for those who have debased or defaced the currency; punching a hole through a coin is a death sentence.

11: Laughing leucrottas, with reddish fur, cloven hooves, and a single solid flat tooth on bottom and top jaw, lurk in the highlands. They compete with ghuls for corpseflesh, which they masticate into a paste. The King of Kings has been seeking out one to add to his menagerie.

12: A fisher-witch of the lowlands rides on twin crocodiles, one foot on each, as she evades the soldiers of the king that keep peace in the river deltas.

 

Statue of the Occulted King (in reality, Dhamar'aliy Yuhbabirr of the Himyarite Kingdom of Yemen)

CHARACTER BACKGROUNDS FROM THE STRAITS

Roll 1d10 or pick (in parentheses are the starting items afforded by the background)
1: Abandoned Ambassador (letter of introduction, a tattered and stained gabi, a walking stick, a gold and pearl memento of home)
2: Agent of the Occulted King (eyes that glance back and forth, a quiet whisper, a silver icon of the Occulted King's hand, a curved jambiya dagger)
3: Dhow Sailor (a dhow, your sea legs, 40' of rope, a short dagger)
4: Disgraced Banker (stolen lockbox with 30 coins in it (1 drachm each), one ear cut off, a great sense of appraisal)
5: Elephant Wrangler (A baby elephant, 60' of rope, 2 spears, experience grappling large animals)
6: Exiled Moneyer (a defaced coin on a string, a crucible for melting metal, a hammer and anvil die, quick feet)
7: Incense Harvester (a thick cloth used for climbing trees, a hammer and scraping tool, thick calluses, a hunk of sweet-smelling resin)
8: Orator of the Occulted King (a scroll of propaganda poetry, a silver tongue, a silver icon of the Occulted King's eye, a curved jambiya dagger)
9: Spice Merchant (a crate of cinnamon, a laboring servant, a set of scales)
10: Stele Carver (a hammer and chisel, extensive construction experience and knowledge of stone, a cowrie-shell necklace declaring your importance)

Fallen obelisk, more standing in the background, Aksum, Ethiopia

TREASURES FROM THE STRAITS

Roll 1d10 or pick:

1: Silver filigreed censer, filled with frankincense.

2: Specialized mancatcher, used by the march-rangers of the northern borderlands to ensnare headless man-eaters whose faces are in their chests. Its wider grip grabs them at the waist.

3: Jambiya dagger in a jewel-encrusted sheath.

4: Fan made from ostrich feathers.

5: Statuette of a previous king of She-ako carved from elephant ivory, set into an ebony base.

6: Wooden helmet that covers the neck and head, with a visor of ivory that can be lowered to block the gaze of the dreadful catoblepas.

7: Amphora with swirling designs, filled with hundreds of coins.

8: Silver necklace with a small walnut shell, complete with hinge and lock; when the walnut locket is opened, it contains a lock of the Occulted King's hair.

9: A gold statuette of a crocodile with a woman sitting atop it.

10: A stone chest full of cinnamon; but be careful! There is a 2-in-6 chance the cinnamon has been adulterated with wood shavings!

Dawit II, emperor of Ethiopia 1507-1540 (its kinda tough to find Ethiopian pictures contemporary with late antiquity unfortunately)

EMBASSY FROM THE STRAITS

The embassy from the straits is a potential random encounter (namely a subtype of the "nobles and veterans" encounter type).

Composition of the embassy:

The Ambassador: as a 1+1 HD noble. Carrying a letter of introduction that declares their stated purpose (roll on the table below). Wields a gold and silver staff topped with a wooden carving of the local god of She-ako.

2d6 slaves.

1d6 lesser ambassadorial staff.

1d3 cooks.

1d3 merchants.

1 augur trained in ornithomancy.

2d6+1 guards (as veterans).

Horses and mules enough for all the above and to transport all the embassy's food, supplies, and any gifts or tribute they bring with them.

The embassy's stated purpose:

Roll 1d6:

1: Summoned on behalf of the satrap to observe local games (and do some trade-related dealings on the side).

2: Investigating rumors of activity by partisans of the Occulted King in the satrapy.

3: Delivering a bank loan (transported in amphorae and lockboxes) to a noble client.

4: Negotiations with a Gnostic Elf merchant (the embassy has gotten lost, in no small part due to the chaos on the border between the ever-warring Gnostic Elves and the Enlightened Empire).

5: Giving tribute to the Kanarang in recognition of his essential role in keeping the lands of civilization safe from the barbarous Land of Darkness.

6: The embassy is more or less autonomous, the ambassador having received a vision in a dream telling him to go north.

The embassy will have with it treasure and tribute, including:

1d3 items from the above treasure list.

4d6x10 She-ako coins (worth 1 drachm each)

Animal skins (incl. elephant, lion, catoblepas, ape, and ostrich feathers) collectively worth 2d6x20 drachmae

Crates of cinnamon, sesame, frankincense, and myrrh worth 500 drachmae or more.

The King of She-ako confronting notables of Hudh... or, in reality, Negus Najashi (possibly the king Armah) refusing the request by the Quraysh to send back the Muslims who emigrated to Ethiopia back to Mecca (from a 14th century manuscript by Rashid ad-Din Hamadani)

Much later than the period I usually take inspiration from, but this was too cool to not include: a plaque depicting a lion from a Zagwe dynasty era church, originally manufactured in southwest India!

Goin' Through the Fiend Folio Part 14 (Retriever to Sheet Phantom)

Alright, back to reviewing every monster in the Fiend Folio, a classic series on this blog that... jeeze louise, the last time I posted one of these was more than a year ago! Uh, my bad. I already talked about why I wasn't so active on the blog in a post back in May, but like, all that goes double for just never getting around to reviewing the FF again. Anyway, here's the first installment in the Goin' Through the Fiend Folio series, here's the last installment, etc etc, let's pick up where we left off!

Retriever

★★★☆☆

Nasty, bloody, and real effective, the retriever is a certified Fiend Folio classic! Six-eyed (with four different eye-rays that cast fire, cold, lightning, and a transmutation spell!) and four-bladed spider-things, constructed by the demon-lord Demogorgon, built in such a way that they "strike maximum terror into their victims." In this description, Demogorgon comes out sounding like a mad scientist of some sort, like a Dr. Frankenstein or a Yakub, except instead of making the white devil race, he made a bunch of evil robot spiders. Or, well, me calling them robots is maybe projecting back onto them somewhat. You see, I was first introduced to the retriever in the 4e Monster Manual 2, the very first D&D book I ever owned, before I even knew what D&D really was! I think I've mentioned this on the blog before, albeit briefly; I basically treated it as a bestiary that communicated an implied setting all its own, with no connection to anything else. And I loved the retriever in the MM2. 

 

You won't hear me say this often, but I actually prefer the version of the monster in 4e than I do here in the AD&D Fiend Folio. This is doubly shocking to me because the FF retriever has art by my favorite Russ Nicholson, with his grotty style bringing a slimy hairy vibe to the original retriever's illustration. And I love grotty, slimy, hairy beasties; but the sleek, explicitly robotic design on the 4e retriever stands out so starkly against monster other demonic entities, giving it a quality almost similar to the smooth slicked-back look of Giger's xenomorph design. Mechanically, the two aren't actually that different; both have four eye rays (though the 4e retriever has each ray pairing a damage type and a lasting effect, so an acid spray that also blinds the target, a thunder-ray (whatever that is) that stuns the target, etc.), both have bladed claws they make melee attacks with, etc.; the major differences are that the AD&D retriever has a fear effect that causes all characters of level 5 or less, or all monsters of HD 6 or less, to save or flee, and that the 4e retriever has a self-healing ability, a "retrieve" ability that grabs a target on a failed save, and "Unerring Accuracy," which allows it to TELEPORT to the approximate location of a given target. That is so cool, and means that the retriever actually, y'know, retrieves; it is a creation given a particular target to teleport to, grab, and then disappear (tho there's a "cooldown" on its unerring accuracy ability). I don't like 4e mechanically, but this retriever that actually retrieves is a much more compelling creature than Dr. Demogorgon's fucked up and evil spider (as much as I love Dr. Demogorgon's creation; one of the more boring elements of the 4e retriever is that it isn't related to any particular demon, but just to "the primordials" in general).

 

 

The 4e MM2 retriever

The revenant in COMBAT

Revenant

★★☆☆☆

This creature has pretty much the same problem as the penanngalan from our last entry: a way too long description that prescribes one particular narrative arc of dealing with it. The revenant (another example of AD&D statting up every single synonym for an undead monster as its own separate entity) takes up a full page and some change to more or less just describe an animated corpse motivated by vengeance against whoever killed it, ceaselessly seeking out its murderer and their associates; on top of that, it cannot be killed by any means except fire, and its limbs will continue to attack even after being severed, and will reattach themselves if they are able to. There you go! Doesn't need a full page of description! But, of course, they have to go into what specific ability scores someone must have to become a revenant when killed, the fact that its immune to turn undead (for the reason that it isn't evil but instead is neutral? Didn't know a cleric's turn undead only works against evil undead, apparently), the fact that it will only attack by strangulation not with weapons, its immunities, eye-based fear ability, when it will hunt down the killer's associates, and how it doesn't even have to be the body of the person killed (very weird and arbitrary decision). This is pretty clearly intended to be a punishment for murder-happy players, unceasingly hunting down the party but with abilities that counteract most strategies players would use to combat the undead. A murder victim hunting down their killer from beyond the grave is incredibly compelling, but the execution here is clunky and overwrought. Love the two Russ Nicholson illustrations they gave it though.

Rothé

★★☆☆☆

Shaggy-furred bovines that live underground. That's about it. They're smaller (only 4 feet tall), presumably as an adaptation for their subterranean environs, but other than that they are little more than cows or yaks. I like the image of underground bovines, but I think I would rather just use normal cows or some kind of explicitly troglobitic cow, rather than this bespoke fictional species. Just kinda meh. 

 

Sandman
★★★☆☆
"The sandman's name describes it exactly"-- I have to appreciate a monster description that opens with that! Mysterious humanoids made from sand that make all who come within 20 feet (or who touch them) very very sleepy. They aren't hostile, only acting to forcibly remove someone asleep under their power if they happen to be in the sandman's lair. Simple but effective! I think I would want one more incongruous weird element to add some depth; as it is right now, the sandman is little more than a word-association game between the fairy tale sandman and literal sand. 

The sandman is our first Fiend Factory creature in this post! The original Factory sandman is more or less the same, just left a bit vaguer in terms of mechanics; though it is also noted that the sandman will attack players at least until they fall asleep, whereas the Folio description doesn't mention attacks on players (though perhaps its assumed). Don Turnbull, in his note on the monster, remarks that the sleep effect means defenseless players left open to wandering monster checks! That's such a good thing to point out; a generally non-hostile creature that incapacitates the players and leaves them open to wandering monsters is always a good thing to have in the dungeon. He also asks why the AC is so high, and y'know thats a good question, I hadn't noticed that: both the Factory and Folio versions of the sandman have AC 3, one point less than plate and shield. Also, the illustration is different, the Factory sandman being much more indistinct, leaning over into a crumbling limp, with "hair" caught in the wind, while the Folio sandman is just a frowning dude done in a stippled style.

Scarecrow
★★★☆☆
It's a scarecrow! The opening line to the sandman's description could work just as well here. Everybody loves a good spooky scarecrow. These are magical constructs that "always... appear evil and of malign intent," and they have turnips and (based on the illustration) gourds for heads. The one weird thing is that the scarecrow has a charm effect that causes the viewer to be stand shock still, as if under the effect of a hold person spell, out of "fascination." Don't know how I feel about that effect, its pretty basic and incongruous but not really in an interesting way. Nothing much else to say, although gotta shout out another great Russ Nicholson illustration!

Screaming Devilkin
★★★☆☆
Despite appearances, not actually a demon or devil, but simply a mundane creature that looks like one. The description specifically compares screaming devilkin to mephits, although its illustration is much more like a chubby little devil baby than the more gremlinesque mephits. Always hostile, always attacks (boring!!), although it attacks with a barbed tail which is always fun. More notably, the screaming devilkin, well, screams! It will constantly scream in the presence of other living creatures, and its screaming is so loud that conversations can't be heard through it and all those in the range of the screaming have to make a save to even just attack or cast a spell. Not the worst power to have, although it's more or less the same thing that the classic Monster Manual monster the shrieker has; I definitely prefer weird screaming mushrooms to weird screaming devil babies.

Shadow Demon
★☆☆☆☆
Incredibly boring. Maybe doesn't quite deserve a 1 star, because it is honestly usable mechanics-wise, but conceptually and mechanically its just boring. "The essence of a demon imprisoned in the form of a shadow," whatever that means; ultimately, it just means that its a souped up alternative to the shadow from the Monster Manual, with a more typical sorta-edgy demon silhouette complete with bat wings and an evil glare. It is more powerful in darkness and weaker in light (yawn! who could've seen that coming!), can cast the darkness spell, has a strong jump because of its wings but can't fly, etc. And it takes up half a page of description to basically say everything that someone would just guess from "shadow but with more magic powers." Very low conceptual density!

Sheet Phantom and Sheet Ghoul
★★★★★
YEAH I'M GIVING THE SHEET PHANTOM FIVE STARS SO WHAT!!! This is one of those classic Fiend Folio monsters that everyone loves to crack jokes about and say is stupid, but that's because everyone hates IMAGINATION and the horror that can come from something incongruous or somewhat goofy. These two monsters are actually listed in reverse order from how I have them here, just due to the alphabetical order, but the sheet phantom is the more important of the two. Sheet phantoms are wraithlike undead that appear as rectangular pieces of cloth (translucent and ghostly? The exact appearance of the rectangle is unclear in the text, just the measurement) and crawl up onto ceilings to drop down on their victims, suffocating them until they perish and rise anew as a sheet ghoul. The description for the sheet ghoul doesn't mention that the sheet phantom hangs on the ghoul, but many later illustrations (see below) depict it that way. Sheet ghouls don't have the paralysis powers of the ghoul, but in exchange they can shoot acid from their nostrils!!!! I love that so much!! Why does the wraithlike sheet phantom cause its undead thralls to snort acid? It feels so gnarly, and like maybe it would slowly corrode and destroy the sheet ghoul as it uses the attack; maybe a sheet ghoul under a sheet phantom's thrall for long enough has a dripping, melting hole in the center of its face where its nose once was, corroded away by its acidic snot. The imagery of the sheet phantom's suffocating attack is also delightfully horrid; I can't help but love the pathetic horror of someone flailing on the ground as they are choked to death by a piece of cloth. I love every single thing about the sheet phantom, this is a sleeper hit!!! The description does note how similar the sheet phantom is to some of AD&D's similar drop-attacking monsters, namely the Lurker Above, a similarly maligned creature from the Monster Manual that I just love (and recently mentioned in the description for my Man-Mimic Lizard!); it even notes the possibility that the sheet phantom is in fact an undead Lurker Above, which is pretty thought-provoking (although I don't know how much it adds to the funny creepiness of the sheet phantom itself).

Here's the illustration from the 2e Monstrous Manual Compendium Fiend Folio; I think the sheet phantom ought to be bigger than that, but I love the image of it hanging on the sheet ghoul's head like that.

That's all for now! The letter S also just so happens to be one of the most monsterful letters in the Folio, so we will be picking up where we left off next time, with the Shocker and, more notably, all the types of Slaad! Stay tuned!

The Carven Carapace (A Ten Room Dungeon for King of Kings)

Back in December, I purchased a little Japanese graph paper notebook, with the intention of filling its pages with as many adventure locations as I could come up with. I wrote up one (which I will be sharing here today) and then... subsequently didn't make any more until yesterday. In my defense, stuff's been goin' on. But anyway, here's the first dungeon I made for this notebook, using my favorite, the Ten Room Dungeon format from friend of the blog Tristyn. All the text is exactly as I wrote it in the notebook, with the addition of some monster stats that I couldn't actually fit into the three little pages I wrote this on and some slight edits for grammar.

THE CARVEN CARAPACE

The skeletal remains of a great tortoise, half-buried in the ground, made into a shrine dedicated to the poet laureate of the long-dead tyrant Shama-Khur. Ancient rumors once told that Shama-Khur was in a torrid homosexual relationship with his beloved poet. The shrine has been abandoned for centuries, other than the occasional peasant giving offerings and paying their respects. It is said, however, that a most beautiful lost poem of the laureate is buried in the turtle, on a slab of stone too heavy to carry out.

You can see the original unedited version of (part of) that description in the corner up there lol

Random Encounters
D6:
1-3: D4 Giant Ground Beetles
4-5: D3 Giant Shrews
6: D6 Dust Bunnies

Random Events [this, like most of my dungeons, assumes an Overloaded Encounter Die, where one of the results is a random dungeon-specific event]
D6:
1: Whispered poetry drifts into earshot.
2: The shell settles, sinking slightly into the ground.
3: Ghostly lewd moaning echoes off the walls.
4: The wafting scent of smokey incense.
5: One of the party members uncontrollably recites a line of verse.
6: A sudden draft animates a little dust cyclone on the floor.

Room Descriptions

1: The altar room. Cones of incense burning, and husks of sacrificed fruit left on the shrine. Stone brick walls depict mythological scenes, and one wall has the great poet on it. Lines of poetry circle the chamber near the ceiling.

2: Former shrine storage chamber. Stone door broken down. Inhabited by Jamshir, wandering vagabond. Desirous of warm clothes and money, but a philistine who cares not for art.

3: 6 of the zodiac signs are on the floor in a circle. A broken alcove in the wall hides a silver necklace worth 160 drachmae.

4: 6 next zodiac signs on the floor in a circle. Line up the 2 circles so that Libra and Gemini face each other through the door between the two chambers, and a secret door opens, as well as revealing an ebony box in a hidden alcove (long looted, but the box is worth 50 drachmae).

[Edit: Had a couple people express confusion over the zodiac wheel thing, which is fair because this text is the very pared down version directly from the notebook so I won't act like its super developed. Rotating the wheels to a given combination would take an exploration turn due to the weight of the wheels. When it comes to communicating the solution to the puzzle, I would likely do it one of two ways: if the dungeon is being ran as a one-shot, there would be a poetic mention of their star signs in the carvings in Room 1; if it is being ran as part of a larger campaign, their respective zodiac signs would be found outside of the dungeon, from an NPC or an ancient scroll.]

5: Secret passageway, intended for the tyrant's heir.

6: Semicircular staircase chamber, hidden behind a half-broken stone door connecting to room 2. Holds a stone chest with 200 drachmae worth of jewels, and a shiny obsidian blade that, on a failed save, slices open the fingers of whoever attempts to pick it up.

7: The inside of the tortoise skull. A crawling mass of black worms blankets the floor.

8: The ultimate chamber, the heart of hearts. A large, octagonal room, dug out of the ground, lined with stone bricks. In the center is a stone table, upon which sits a clay effigy of the poet laureate, and at his feet is a stone chest within which is a papyrus roll of poetry, which would be worth upwards of 3,000 drachmae to the right buyer. When the scroll is removed from the chest, 4d6 dust bunnies take shape and confront the adventurers.

9: A smaller side chamber, carved out of the tortoise's femur bone: the tomb of the poet laureate's mad brother. Clutched in his desiccated claw is a scroll with a vindictive spell of jealousy scrawled on it. He sits on a rotted fleece, next to a crust of bread and jug of wine.

10: The dug-out underground burrow of a mated pair of badgers, and their 4 offspring (who hide in the phalanges of the tortoise). Connected by a tunnel to a hollowed-out tree stump that can serve as an alternate entrance or exit point.

Badger
Number Encountered: 2 (+4 young)
Hit Dice: 1-1
Attacks: 2 bite (2 points of damage)
Armor: none
Morale: 9

Beetle, Giant Ground
Number Encountered: 1d4
Hit Dice: 1+4
Attacks: 2 bite (1d6+1) or 1 slam (1d6 and save or be pinned against wall)
Armor: as leather + shield
Morale: 7

Dust Bunny
Number Encountered: 1d6
Hit Dice: 1-1
Attacks: 1 bite (1d4) + 1 kick (1d4)
Armor: none
Morale: 5
Dispel and Disperse: Dust bunnies are animated by lingering feelings of sorrow and yearning. They can be dispersed by gusts of wind or the movement of fans, but will eventually reform (though this may give the players an opportunity to flee). They take no damage from mundane weaponry. Dust bunnies are immediately dispelled by the spell Remove Fear.

Shrew, Giant
Number Encountered: 1d3
Hit Dice: 1+1
Attacks: 2 bite (1d6)
Armor: as leather
Morale: 9
Agility: Always win initiative on the first round of combat, and +1 to initiative each round after.
Venom: On a successful hit, the victim of the shrew's bite must save vs. poison or be weakened and sickly, taking 2 points of damage each turn for the next 1d12 turns.

The above dungeon is, at times (not always, given how I gave into my proclivity for more flowery language there in those last two rooms), much more terse than the usual material I post to the blog. I think the constraint of the paper size in the notebook is a good influence there, causing me to really think through what I have to actually note or describe (which is why, for instance, the monster stats were originally left out). Anyway, hope y'all at least get something out of this dungeon!

The Short-Legged Man-Mimic Lizard

A friend and coworker of mine gave me an old drawing tablet she no longer uses, as a gift. I haven't used drawing tablets all that much, mostly because when I was younger I just sorta bounced off of the only one I had ever attempted to use, not quite able to wrap my head around drawing without looking at my hand holding the pen. This time, it has come much easier to me; I guess I just needed time to grow and improve or whatever. Anyway, here's a monster I drew (in MSPaint) with that drawing tablet the day I was given it.

Short-Legged Man-Mimic Lizard
Number Encountered: 1d3
Hit Dice: 1
Attacks: 2 claw (1d4) + 1 bite (1d6)
Armor: as leather + shield
Morale: 6
False Face: The short-legged man-mimic lizard sports a false human face on the underside of its neck, which, in low-light conditions, vaguely resembles a real human face. Human beings will recognize that it isn't a person, but non-humans and animals may be tricked by it.
Mating Display: Male short-legged man-mimic lizards create elaborate, almost sculptural, structures to entice females during their mating season; these often incorporate large collections of pearls collected from the insides of their prey, deliberately placed in pillars of dried lizard waste and mud. These courtship structures will contain 3d6 pearls worth 2d4*5 gold [or silver if using a silver standard] each.
Toe Pads: The short-legged man-mimic lizard has subtly hooked scaly pads on the underside of its feet, allowing it to climb walls and ceilings.

A true result of the intertwined ecosystems in subterranean dungeons, the short-legged man-mimic lizard is an active, skittering predator that prowls dimly lit halls and cavern tunnels in search of its prey. Its method of hunting: subterfuge. These reptiles feature an uncanny imitation of a human face on the pale green underside their necks, complete with bumps that resemble a nose, ears, and the folds of the cheeks and brows, a crescent moon of scarlet a la lipsticked lips, and large orange and white eyespots that, in low light conditions, would look like a human's eyes, wide in shock, to any dumb beast of the underground. One might assume the man-mimic lizard uses this facsimile to ensnare human prey, but this couldn't be further from the truth: the short-legged man-mimic lizard isn't a man-eater, but an eater of man-eaters!

Dungeons are full of monsters that have taken a liking to the taste of human flesh, namely soft-bodied invertebrates and cartilaginous creatures like Ropers, Trappers, Lurkers Above, and Cloakers. Coming upon one such man-eater, the man-mimic rears its neck, inflates the red wattles so that they sway about like hair in nonexistent wind, and positions itself right in front of its quarry's beady little eyes. When the Roper ensnares it in its tentacles or the Trapper curls its stiff body around the lizard, the man-mimic begins its vicious struggle, its needle teeth and razor claws slicing through mollusc and cave-ray flesh like butter. While sometimes the man-eater wins out, most often the man-mimic lizard leaves with a belly full of slimy flesh and its prey's green ichor blood strewn all across the dungeon floor.

Adventurers have nothing to fear from short-legged man-mimic lizards; they generally (unless under the influence of a spell or disease that addles the mind) do not engage with human or demihuman interlopers, and tend to avoid adventuring parties. The man-mimicry won't work half as well if there's real humans right next to them! They will attempt some resistance if, during their mating season, adventurers attempt to pilfer their courtship structures. Embedded in the guano and mud daub pillars of their elaborate courtship nests are pearls, little marbles of glimmering white, torn from the gullets of Ropers and Lurkers Above; these can be valuable collections for enterprising dungeon delvers. If these dungeon-pearls are large enough, they can fetch high prices from jewellers and collectors up top!

It's been too long redux (this time it's longer!)

I have kinda hesitated on making this post because it is a genre of post that has unfortunately come to typify my online creative spaces; the perennial "I miss this place, its been too too long since the last time I posted, sorry about the hiatus" post. I've even already made this post a year and a half ago, and that hiatus was barely more than 3 months; I haven't posted to this blog in more than 5 months, almost a full half a year. I've been in quite possibly the worst creative slump of my life, which had definitely started before my last post here, but definitely got worse in January-February. Haven't ran any more sessions of the King of Kings game since the last session report, haven't really written anything TTRPG related other than a couple of dungeons, and outside of RPGs, I've been struggling with motivation to work on my neocities site, to start and finish short stories, and to draw (though the latter has come back much more than the rest).

In my defense (not like I really need a defense or justification, but you know), it has been a very eventful and difficult past 5-6 months. Most significantly, and many of you who know me personally will already know this of course, on January 27, 2024, my grandfather was struck by a car and passed away; subsequently, a blood vessel burst in my grandmother's spine in an example of very sudden "broken heart syndrome," causing her to be paralyzed from the waist down. For pretty obvious reasons, this event and its aftermath dominated the subsequent few months. My grandma is doing better now to be clear, but she very much is paralyzed from now on, and having to navigate that; but obviously I'm not the one experiencing that, so I can't say much more than that.

(As an aside, I was originally going to make a drawing dedicated in memory to my grandpa, but hit some... snags in the process of making that, so I'm not able to share that right now like I originally wanted to. Not having that done was another thing contributing to me not writing anything for the blog; I wanted to have that to share along with the explanation for what's been going on.)

I don't really have much more to say, other than that I want to get back into the swing of posting to this blog over the summer; I'm going to set twin goals of finishing the Goin' Through the Fiend Folio series (which has been ongoing, unfinished since pretty much the creation of the blog!) and finishing up the King of Kings country overviews that I started last year. In the fall, I will (hopefully) be starting a graduate school program in Library Science, so who knows what will come of Save vs. Worm at that point, but hey we're not there yet.

Anyway, love you all, keep checking back here if you want to see more D&D stuff this summer, and uhh that's pretty much it.

Requiescat in Pace
Ralph Miller, September 10, 1947-January 27, 2024